


I Love You To Love Me

by neighborhoodstray



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: 5+1 Things, Akiteru Is a Good Supportive Brother, And Is Mentioned Twice in Others, Brotherly Love, Business Man Kuroo Tetsurou, Childhood Trauma, Dissociation, Don't Worry Big Bro Knows How to Help, He Just Wants Kei to be Happy, Just Tsuki and The Boys Learning to Love, Kinda A Sickfic But Only The First Part, M/M, Manga Publisher Akaashi Keiji, Mild Angst, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Museum Worker Tsukishima Kei, No Idea What Akiteru is Tbh, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Polyamory, Pro Volleyball Player Bokuto Koutarou, Sickfic, Tsukishima Kei is Bad at Feelings, With The Help Of Big Bro Akiteru, Yamaguchi Tadashi Shows Up for One Chapter, nothing too bad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 08:00:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25930012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neighborhoodstray/pseuds/neighborhoodstray
Summary: Five (5) Times Akiteru Helped Akaashi, Bokuto, and Kuroo Understand Tsukishima and One (1) Time Tsukishima Helped Them Understand Akiteru.(also known as me wanting to write Akiteru & Kei brotherly bonding fanservice as well as throwing in my favourite poly-couple)
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou/Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei, Tsukishima Akiteru & Tsukishima Kei
Comments: 79
Kudos: 521





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> this fic idea has been in my notes for a month and stewing in my brain for longer, please feel free to comment as that helps me keep updates on schedule. i plan on updating every two weeks (may not be impressive but my attention span is already quaking). my works are not beta-read currently but if you spot any mistakes please message me and it will be fixed!
> 
> please enjoy!

**no. 1**

Kuroo’s eyes slowly adjusted to the dark room, scanning across the bed at his lovers illuminated by the bright moon outside their window. 

Well...one, two, thr-...two of his lovers. 

The realisation one was missing rose Kuroo out of bed. He shifted out slowly, uncurling his hand from Bokuto’s grasp, untangling his legs from Akaashi’s and painfully remembering the normal embrace of his other lover that should’ve been in the bed with him.

The disappearance of his blonde boyfriend felt apparent in the empty space where they normally spooned. (Kuroo wrapped against Tsukishima’s back, Tsukishima’s head resting under Akaashi’s chin against his chest while Akaashi laid on his back and then Bokuto spread out across the three of them like a blanket.) The lack of their youngest in Kuroo’s arms made him a different kind of anxious. 

Now out of bed and the warmth of his boyfriends Kuroo scanned the room and noticed the bathroom attached to their bedroom had it’s door open still, no light spilling from it. That knocked away the possibility that Tsukishima had just left to relieve himself. Maybe...he got hungry? Tsukishima always had the weirdest eating habits out of the four and the idea he had just left to make a sandwich or snack gave Kuroo comfort. 

Making way to the bedroom door Kuroo opened it slowly and slid out, mindful of the creaky spot next to the doorframe and his currently dreaming boyfriends. Now in the hallway, Kuroo noticed the livingroom lamp was turned on. The warm light scattering softly against the wood floors of the house, illuminating in an orange glow.

Walking out of the hallway into the livingroom Kuroo was finally greeted with the blonde he set out for, though the sight was unexpected. 

Tsukishima was laid across their couch, wrapped in a blanket he probably stole from Bokuto’s side of the bed. His face was buried against the back cushions and he had no pillow under his neck, his head instead leaning down in what looked like an extremely uncomfortable position.

As Kuroo got closer he noticed the pillow in question was thrown to the floor and...oh. A bottle of Tylonol sat next to it. 

Kuroo then slowly sat next to the blonde, reaching gentle hands to move his lovers face to get a better look at him. Tsukishima let Kuroo turn his head, eyebrows scrunching and a pained groan escaping as his eyes slowly opened to meet Kuroo’s. Kuroo frowned as he saw the cloudiness that was settled over Tsukishima’s eyes and the lack of recognition of anything going on around him. 

Now reaching his hands to Tsukishima’s forehead he frowned deeper. Tsukishima was warm, so warm compared to the normal cool temperature he usually was. As Kuroo moved his hand again to better feel the boy’s forehead Tsukishima lifted up a hand to slap him away. 

Kuroo grunted at the out of character treatment towards his touch. 

“Tsuki, it’s just me.” Kuroo tried to reason as all of a sudden any action to touch his lover was met with Tsukishima’s resistance, the blonde now suddenly trying to bury his head back into the couch cushions.

“Tsu-Kei, _Kei_. Quit fighting me, I’m just trying to help.” Tsukishima continued to not answer, just squirming and hitting at Kuroo’s attempts to touch him. 

Kuroo felt himself growing frustrated at what seemed like extremely childish behaviour from his boyfriend. He was just trying to talk to him, see what was wrong, see what he could do. But all Tsukishima was doing was attempting to bury himself further in the couch and ignoring Kuroo’s help. 

Kuroo then got up with a huff, thinking maybe he was the one who needed help with this. Walking back to their shared room he didn’t strive to be quite like before. He opened the door, making a beeline for his still sleeping lovers. (The two deep-sleepers of the four.)

“Kou, Keiji, wake up _please_.” Kuroo pleaded as he shook both of Bokuto and Akaashi’s shoulders. 

Bokuto was the first to open his eyes, half-lidded and obviously still tired as he looked over Kuroo’s worried expression. 

“What’s wrong Testu? Is something goi-where’s Kei?” Bokuto asked, eyes now looking sleepily over the too-empty bed around him and gradually waking up with each passing second.

Akaashi then belatedly opened his eyes as well, untangling himself from Bokuto and sitting up. The two shuffling out of the pillows and blankets.

“He left to sleep on the couch sometime last night, he’s possibly sick, he feels like he has a fever and I think he took some pain medicine but he’s not talking to me. Hell, he’s not even responding to me.” Bokuto and Akaashi’s eyes widened at Kuroo’s explanation of the situation. Both now moving to head to the living room with Kuroo. 

Back in the living room, Tsukishima was in the same position as Kuroo had left him. Pressed into the couch cushions and silent.

Akaashi sat next to the couch, reaching to run a hand against Tsukishima’s back as a way to comfort his sick boyfriend but all he got in return was the same squirming and batting Kuroo had received. Akaashi seemed shocked. 

“Kei, it’s just us baby. Talk to us, we just wanna help.” But again it seemed like their words didn’t reach the younger. 

Bokuto then stepped closer, grabbing Tsukishima’s shoulder and turning him to the side. Immediately Tsukishima hit at Bokuto’s grasp on his shoulder, it was a dull and fever-weakened hit but Bokuto let go none the less, a saddened expression now on his face.

Akaashi sighed as they continued to get nowhere with the blonde. 

“Maybe we should call Yamaguchi. I know he’s an hour away but I don’t even think Kei can hear us, his fever might be worse than we assumed. We don’t wanna fight him or worse, hurt him.” Akaashi reasoned. 

Kuroo thought it over before responding. “Do you think calling Akiteru-san would be better? He’s only twenty minutes away and he is Kei’s older brother. He probably has more experience with a sick Kei than we apparently do.”

Bokuto nodded in agreement and so did Akaashi. 

The three could honestly say they have seen Tsukishima sick only once before this time. Last winter when he had gotten a small cold to be exact but back then the four weren’t living together yet. (As Tsukishima was still working through his last year of college as well as finishing out the four-year lease he had on the apartment he used to share with his childhood best friend.) And as per the boy’s wishes, they all stayed away the duration he was sick.

Now the three were regretting it as this situation was stressing them out beyond compare. Their youngest was sick and refusing their help, instead just shivering and hiding against their shared couch. 

Akaashi stood up from his spot next to Tsukishima to grab his phone. As Akaashi retreated to their room Bokuto and Kuroo planted themselves on the floor next to the couch, afraid to get any closer and wanting to comfort their lover at the same time. Tsukishima continued to bury himself in the couch as if afraid they were going to touch him again. It made Bokuto and Kuroo’s hearts weep in their chests. 

Soon Akaashi returned with phone-in hand and eyebrows scrunched in worry as he to moved to sit with the two on the floor. Also now worried to get closer to the sick and silent blonde on the couch. 

Fidgeting with his hands Akaashi turned the phone on speaker as the dial tone rung out into the room. The three leaned in closer to each other, all whispering silent hopes that the older Tsukishima would pick up his phone. 

“He-Hello? Akaashi? Is something wrong? It’s three in the morning, is something wrong with Kei?” Akiteru’s voice filled the space, obviously woken from a deep sleep and confused by the rude awakening. 

“Sorry, sorry, we didn’t even notice the time… we woke up about fifteen minutes ago to find out Kei’s sick and we’re… we’re at our limits at what to do to be quite honest.” Akaashi explained, his own voice tired and filled with worry.

“He won’t talk to us and we keep on trying to move him to face us but he keeps swatting at us. He’s about buried himself in the couch by now.” Kuroo added. 

Akiteru then let out a sigh and with that, the three could hear rustling sheets and a door opening through the phone speaker. 

“He probably just has a stomach bug then, he must love you guys...moving to the couch like that in the middle of the night.” Akiteru grumbled and the three weren’t entirely sure he meant to say it out loud. 

“What does that mean? And if it’s just a stomach bug then why is he ignoring us and stuff?” Bokuto asked, shoving himself against Akaashi to get closer to the phone. 

“Kei used to get sick a lot as a kid, whenever something was going around you could bet it would reach him. Does he have a fever? If he does that’s probably why he’s hiding from you all.” Akiteru appeared to be running around his own apartment, mumbling about ‘my goddamn keys’ and ‘where did my shoes go?’ as he answered their questions.

“Yeah, I checked earlier and he seemed pretty warm.” Answered Kuroo. 

“Ohh-I know what’s wrong then, I’ll be there in...uhhh- ten minutes.” Claimed Akiteru as a loud slam of a door was heard as well as the sound of sneakers against cement.

“Akiteru-san, you live twenty minutes away.” Claimed Akaashi as they continued to now listen to the sounds of Akiteru unlocking his car door and what appeared like he threw himself into. 

“Not with the road this empty late at night.” And with that Akiteru hung up. 

...

Akaashi, Bokuto, and Kuroo were honestly surprised it actually took Akiteru ten minutes to get to the shared apartment. But even so, they wasted no time in opening the door for the older once they heard the almost fanatic knock. 

Once in the apartment, Akiteru also wasted no time kicking off his shoes and heading straight to the couch where his younger brother was still pressed into the couch. 

The three stood close together as they watched Akiteru immediately start moving Kei to lay on his back against the boys’ struggles. Kei immediately flinging his arms at Akiteru’s hold on his sides in an almost bruising force.

“Stop. Fighting. Me.” Akiteru advised, voice stern as he moved a hand to check the warm skin of Kei’s forehead. 

“You have a stomach bug don’t you, you noticed it earlier and moved to the couch didn’t you?” Asked Akiteru but it came out more like a statement. 

Kei had his eyes scrunched closed as he then squirmed his head away, refusing to answer in any way or to even look at his older brother. This only seemed to make Akiteru more confident as he leaned over, pinning Kei down to keep Kei’s thrashing under control.

“ _Hotaru_. Talk to me.” The name seemed to somehow, like a miracle, lessen Kei’s thrashing. Leaving Akaashi, Kuroo, and Bokuto in shock. Watching anxiously as Kei then slowly opened his eyes, making contact with his brothers gaze. 

From their stances away from the couch, Kuroo couldn’t see if Kei’s eyes were still glassed over or the expression the younger had on his face but he could only assume it wasn’t enough to get Akiteru to give up on wrestling Kei down.

“If you throw up you’ll feel better, I know you don’t like staying sick for long. If you throw up it’ll help get whatever’s bothering you out of your system.” Reasoned Akiteru. 

And for the first time that night, Kei spoke. 

“Nii-san _please_ , no, I don’t wanna throw up.” Kei’s voice was scratchy and whiney and it broke his lover’s hearts. They wanted to be over there, comforting their youngest, taking care of him but they knew it was better to let Akiteru deal with it. Bokuto took Kuroo’s hand as he turned to hide behind Akaashi, the resolve of his partners being the only thing to hold him back from running over to the couch.

“You have a fever Hotaru, you’re sick. You need to throw up, take a cold bath and then rest. Don’t try and argue with me. I know you hate it but I promise you’ll feel better afterwards.” Akiteru pleaded as he lightened his grip on his brother, instead grabbing Kei’s hands to help pull him up from the couch.

“You’re head and stomach hurt right? That’s why you were hiding in the couch?” Asked the older Tsukishima as they both started to make their way off the said couch. 

“Hmmn… body achy… touch burns, everything burns, it’s hot and my… stomach hurts… head hurts-...Nii-san, I don’t wanna throw up please don’t make me.” Kei pleaded again as Akiteru just continued to lead him to the bathroom back in the hallway, Kuroo, Bokuto, and Akaashi following silently. 

“So that’s why he kept pushing us away.” Muttered Akaashi as they silently stood behind, not wanting to follow the two brothers into the bathroom, assuming Akiteru was actually going to make Kei throw up. Something that would be embarrassing to Kei and also something he wouldn’t want his boyfriends to witness. 

“I’m guessing since he used to get sick all the time he knew he’d get all touchy-meanie and moved to the couch.” Bokuto commented as Kuroo nodded his head in agreement. 

“Why does he have to be so sweet, what the fuck happened to that cold-hearted Ice Prince we first started dating?” Kuroo joked as they all moved out of the hallway to sit on the now-empty couch, not wanting to intrude on their lover and lovers brother dealing with said lover. 

“Oh shut it Tetsu, we all know he was never as cold as he seemed.” Akaashi smiled softly at his statement, grabbing Kuroo’s hand and Bokutos with his other. 

...

It took an hour before Akiteru emerged from the bathroom with a very worn out Kei following. Kuroo and Bokuto had both passed out during their wait for their blonde boyfriend but Akaashi was still wide awake. He felt his heart throb at what was not the first time that night at the sight of the younger Tsukishima. 

Kei was still fever flushed and his eyes were trailing wistfully over the sight of his boyfriends knocked out in front of him with _want_ , translucent tear tracks running down his cheeks. 

Akaashi sent him a small smile he hoped was comforting. “Feeling better, moonshine?”

Kei silently nodded his head as Akiteru gave Akaashi an exaggerated eye roll. 

“He’s fine, he’s just a baby when it comes to throwing up, he just needs some rest.” Akiteru patronized lightly as he made his way back to the front door, grabbing his shoes leaving Kei to slowly make his way over to the couch again.

Akaashi frowned, untangling himself from Kuroo and Bokuto on the couch to grab ahold of Kei’s exhausted form and turning to face Akiteru. 

“Leaving so soon?” Akaashi asked, arms wrapping around Kei’s form to let him rest in Akaashi’s hold. 

Akiteru smiled before reaching over to ruffle Kei’s hair affectionately. “Yeah, I have work in the morning still. This guy threw up and rested for a little in the bathroom, his fever is back down as well. Just give him some pain meds and he should be all better by tomorrow.”

Kei turned his head to give Akiteru a glare but both the men around him could tell there was no menace behind it. Akiteru just let out a small laugh as he turned to slip his shoes on.

Akaashi then pulled Kei towards the couch, leading him to settle between the two passed out boys already there. Kei sat with ease, eyes closing from exhaustion and body quickly falling limp against the soft comfort of the couch and the now trailing hands of his half-awake boyfriends. 

Akaashi then walked to the door, meeting Akiteru just as his hand reached the doorknob. 

“This is the first time he’s gotten sick with us around and we didn’t quite know what to do. My apologies for the late-night intrusion.” Akaashi apologised, busying his hands with fidgeting together as the older Tsukishima gave him a light pat on the back. 

“To be honest, when Kei first told me he was dating, you know, three people, I was worried. He pushes people away so easily, doesn’t show his emotions well and it really scared me how you guys were gonna turn out but after this...I know my baby brother is in good hands and in turn I know he’s figuring out how to show he cares. You’ve got nothing to apologise for Akaashi.” Akiteru smiled at Akaashi before finally turning the doorknob and leaving the apartment. 

Akaashi could only shake his head at the older Tsukishima. 

“Thank you, Akiteru-san.”


	2. II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That One Time the Ot4 Visited the Tsukishima Family Home and Noticed a Whole Bunch of "Weird" Habits the Family Had and Started Collectively Overthinking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part III is just finished and I'll be starting on Part IV soon! (I post a part once I finish the one after it because it's the only way I keep up with my due dates, I don't understand why but it works)
> 
> Comments and Kudos are extremely appreciated and water my crops!
> 
> Hope you all enjoy!
> 
> reminder: my work is NOT beta read (due to me having no friends) so any mistakes you find please message me about them!

**no.2**

It was a last-minute visit for sure but the group of boyfriends could never turn down an opportunity to spend time with their youngest’s family. Tsukishima’s mom being the sweetest and most understanding mother, not to mention a snarky though tamed version of her two sons. And Akiteru coming to visit as well definitely sweetened the pot, the older never failing to bring up some embarrassing story or such to their blonde boyfriend’s dismay but to the enjoyment of everyone else. 

So on a cloudy Sunday afternoon, Bokuto’s car was packed with his lovers and enough clothes for a week as they made their way down to Miyagi. Bokuto was in the driver’s seat, Tsukishima in the passenger, and Kuroo and Akaashi were shoved in the back. (As the two always passed out during car rides and Tsukishima needed to be in the front so he could have easier access to the phone charger, not willing to go without his music and headphones any part of the trip.)

The Tsukishima house was moderately sized, three bedrooms upstairs, a big living room and dining room, and a pretty spacious backyard with a volleyball net still pitched up from the brother’s school days. 

They would all be staying in Tsukishima's old room. Much to the youngers annoyance and much to the other’s enjoyment. Akiteru, in turn, would also be staying in his own room though did offer to sleep on the couch if things got too cramped in Kei’s room. 

Kei’s mother, Hikaru-san as she insisted, met them at the door. A smiling and waving Akireru behind her as he raced to the car to greet his brother.

Kei took his time though, unplugging his phone and stretching in his seat before even turning to face his brother. Said brother now pushing his face against the glass of the passenger window of the car. 

Kei rolled his eyes, threatening to smash the door against Akiteru if he didn’t move. Akaashi and Kuroo soon woke up from the ruckus, having not moved from their knocked out positions in the back seats despite the car stopping. Bokuto about launched himself out of the car, sick of the two-hour drive he had to endure driving through.

Since Akaashi and Kuroo slept the whole ride they were tasked with unloading everyone’s luggage as Hikaru-san ushered her youngest son and lover inside, taking pity of the ‘poor boy that had to drive so long’. Bokuto flourished under the attention of his boyfriend’s mother, indulging her in what the traffic was like, how much money gas was for the trip, and how beautiful the countryside was compared to the roaring city the boys were used to. 

It was soon as the boys all got settled in the Tsukishima house and the trip had really sunk in that they noticed something, unusual. 

The peculiar habits of the Tsukishima family.

The boys before this trip had only stayed over once before, a Christmas break the past year, but only for a few days. Not long enough to notice anything out of the normal back then, all of the Tsukishima family in question having relatively normal habits. Habits like Akiteru playing music during dinner, Hikaru-san always leaving the backdoor open to air out the house, and Kei helping his mother with breakfast every morning. But these new ones they were noticing were, different to say the least.

… 

The first day of their stay with the Tsukishima’s was when Kuroo noticed the first weird habit. The said habit nearly scaring the shit out of him that morning. 

Having surprisingly gotten up later than his lovers (all of them that night surprisingly managing to squeeze themselves onto Kei’s old bed) Kuroo had headed to the bathroom alone. Slipping out of cold dinosaur sheets and padding across Kei’s room silently. Kuroo reached for the doorknob to head out but found the door...resisting? 

Kuroo looked around the room, gaze falling on the open window and box fan sat in it, hand still on the doorknob. Thinking quickly he thought it must be something to do with the air pressure, mind drifting to the back door he knew was open and the multiple doors in the hallway outside that weren’t. 

Now knowing the situation, Kuroo prepared himself to fight against the door and air pressure. Deciding the slamming of the back door worth the risk to get out of the damn room to use the bathroom. 

Right as Kuroo got the door to open a loud slam was heard from the other side of the house. This was expected. 

The loud yelling of “DOOR!”, was not.

The shout had sounded like a combination of his blonde boyfriend and said boyfriends brother. Though, being honest with himself this was probably the first time he had ever heard either of them yell. (Kei actually turning out to be a very quiet person during arguments, preferring his vicious words to show his anger. Not to mention the only other scenario of Kei being anywhere close to noisy being a...more private context. And the older Tsukishima never being around in a situation permitting such noise.)

In all honesty, the outcry had frightened him the fuck out.

By the time he made it to the living room where the rest of his boyfriends were situated the back door was back open and no one said anything about the loud warning of the door slamming.

(Though Kuroo did bring it up with Akaashi and Bokuto when they went on a walk together on a grocery run for dinner that evening. Akaashi and Bokuto both thought it was strange but figured with Hikaru-san’s fashion of leaving the back door open it was something the brothers had grown accustomed to. Nothing for any of them to worry about.)

… 

The day after it was Bokuto that noticed another weird habit. Since arriving at the house Kei would surprisingly sleep near the edge of their cuddle pile. (Kei now on the edge facing away from the rest of his boyfriends had caused Bokuto to start wrapping one arm around his waist to keep him from falling off in his sleep.) 

That night Bokuto was having trouble falling asleep, hoping closing his eyes and staying still would eventually lead sleep to overtake him as Akaashi always told him. Maybe around three am Bokuto heard the bedroom door open. Peering over his sleeping blonde boyfriend Bokuto made eye contact with…

“Akiteru-san?” Bokuto whispered as said older boy nodded silently, walking closer to the bed. 

“Sorry if I woke you, I came to ask Kei something. Mind waking him up?” Asked Akiteru, keeping his voice down as he crouched down in front of Kei.

Bokuto quirked his eyebrow but complied with what was asked of him, untangling his other arm from Kuroo behind him and running a hand down Kei’s back. 

“Babe?” Bokuto asked as he nudged Kei awake. 

Kei groaned, obviously pissed that he was woken up, eyes first shooting to glare at Bokuto. Bokuto quickly pointed to Akiteru in his defence, not willing to take the blame and endure a cranky boyfriend. 

Once Kei made eye contact with Akiteru, Akiteru gave him a lazy smile in return. 

“Hungry?” he asked. 

With just a simple question all of a sudden Kei was slipping out of Bokuto’s arms. Bokuto frowned and tried to hold onto Kei’s shirt, confused and upset why his boyfriend was leaving.

Sensing Bokuto’s panic Kei quickly turned around to give Bokuto a quick kiss, one of his hands reaching to cup his cheek as he attempted to soothe his partner. Bokuto still pouted as Kei pulled away. 

“Where are you going?” He asked, voice still quiet but obviously a little distressed. 

Kei gave him a quick peck again, smiling lightly down at him. “Just to get a late-night snack in the kitchen, Kou. I’ll be back before you know it.”

The Tsukishima brothers then left with the quiet click of the door, leaving Bokuto to count the minutes before his lover came back.

And Bokuto really counted, it was thirty-three minutes and twenty-seven seconds before Kei came back. 

Kei opened and closed the door slowly, hoping to slip back into the room silently. Getting closer to the bed he could see the golden stare of his owlish boyfriend on his figure, smiling at his return. 

Kei chuckled lightly before slipping back into the hold of said boyfriend, cuddling back into his embrace. 

“What’d you eat babe?” Bokuto asked, whispering lightly into Kei’s ear, causing a shiver to go down the blonde’s back.

“Nii-san microwaved some leftover scalloped potatoes, I ate about half a bowl.” Kei replied, running a hand down Bokutos arm that was wrapped around his waist again.

Bokuto nodded before setting a soft kiss on Kei’s cheek, a quiet “G’night babe.” before he settled back down onto the pillow, closing his eyes again and this time falling asleep. 

The next night when it happened again Bokuto then thought it was important enough to tell his other boyfriends about it.

(“I think it’s a little weird they both get so hungry at night, half a bowl of potatoes is like a feast compared to Tsukki’s normal diet!” exclaimed Bokuto as he and the rest of his lovers, excluding said blonde, pulled weeds together out in the Tsukishima backyard. A task asked of them from Hikaru-san as her and Kei made dinner for the six of them.

Akaashi hummed in response, taking a break to wipe some sweat off his forehead. 

“Well, they did grow up together and they are related. Their appetite could be a cause of either of those.” Kuroo nodded along to Akaashi’s explanation. 

“Yeah Bo, maybe they just ate snacks late at night all the time as kids and it’s still a habit. Or they literally just both get hungry at night. Don’t think about it too deeply, you’ll give yourself more grey hairs.” Kuroo joked as Bokuto quickly pounced on him to whine and pout in response to the light teasing.

But they did think about.)

...

Akaashi noticed the next habit. Though it was subtle, Akaashi could understand why it took so long for his other partners to notice. 

Every minute, every waking second… it was never silent. 

At first, Akaashi truly thought he was over exaggerating. ‘Surely there are times when it’s quiet around the house, being away from home for so long is just messing with my head.’ And he honestly believed that. 

Until he started to take note. 

In the morning Hikaru-san would wake up Kei and Akiteru to help her make breakfast. She would play a weird mix of pop Spanish music. An old Bluetooth speaker that looked like it had seen hell and more sitting on the kitchen counter as they worked. 

After breakfast, if they hadn’t gone out and instead stayed home the speaker in the living room would be turned on. Playing a playlist apparently Akiteru and Kei had produced together. A combination of English rap and rock. It would play until lunch.

Then during lunch, it would switch to classical. No matter if they ate outside on the engawa or inside at the dinner table the soft sounds of piano, violin, cello, and flute would become the soundtrack of their meal. Akaashi wasn’t sure which of the family members liked it.

Before dinner, the classical would be changed to a different playlist once again. Playing slow j-pop and lo-fi. This playlist apparently made for Hikaru-san to relax before she and her sons got up to make dinner. It was endearing, to say the least, watching Hikaru-san sing quietly as she worked on cross-stitching or flipping through a magazine while sitting relaxed in the living room.

During dinner the slow playlist Akaashi personally rather liked was changed to Akiteru’s. All American 80’s-2000’s top songs. Akaashi had to watch a large number of dinner performances from Bokuto and Kuroo trying to reenact hits like ‘Everybody by the Backstreet Boys’ and ‘Womanizer by Britany Spears’. (Though he would admit they were funny with both of his boyfriend’s lack of good English and self-preservation.)

And by nightfall, a radio in the hallway was turned on, though at a low volume. Tuned into the local station.

Never a second of silence. 

And never a comment on it.

(“It’s never quiet in the house, have you noticed that?” asked Akaashi, currently curled up behind Kuroo on their position on the Tsukishima couch. A knocked out Bokuto and Kei beside them. 

Kuroo nodded. “I think they just can’t stand silence, kinda like how Tsukki was deathly attached to those headphones in high school. It’s just a-”

“Another weird habit?” Akaashi cut off. 

Kuroo didn’t answer but Akaashi could see off the corner of his cheek that he was frowning.)

… 

“Akiteru-san?” Akaashi asked, voice sturdy and evenly toned. 

Akiteru let his eyebrows scrunch in confusion as he looked at the scene he walked himself into that morning. It was Akaashi, Bokuto, Kuroo, and Kei’s last day at the house and currently Kei and his mother were on a grocery run. Deciding as a treat before they would start the long drive back home they would make crepes. 

Akaashi’s stare never wavered, if anything it grew stronger as Bokuto and Kuroo joined him. They were seated along the living room kotatsu, ready for a discussion with the older Tsukishima. 

“Uhh-Can I help you all?” Akiteru asked, looking like he was reconsidering wither he should have left his room that morning. 

“Why do you guy’s shout ‘door’?!” Asked Bokuto, launching into the questions without hesitation. 

“Yeah, and what’s up with you and Tsukki always eating so late at night? You literally come in and take him!” Kuroo added, swinging an arm of support around Bokuto’s shoulders. 

“Not to mention, why is there music all the time?!” 

Akiteru looked shocked and to be quite honest, upset, at the badgering of questions. His body growing stiffer at the sudden interrogation. Almost like walls going up, almost like his younger brother.

“I-I uh-I’m not sure what you mean? It’s just habits we have, I guess. Got a problem with it?” Akiteru shrugged but slowly started moving closer to sit at the table with them. Eyebrows scrunched as he straightened his gaze to stare them down. 

Despite Akiteru being the most, passive, of the Tsukishima siblings it was a known secret that when it came down to it he was just as smart and level-headed as his younger brother. 

“We just want to know why, like, should we start playing music in our home for Tsuki? Is there a reason we should be aware of loud noises like doors or- I guess what I’m, we’re, trying to ask is-” Kuroo tried to explain, shoulders feeling heavy under the stare of Akiteru. 

“Is there more we should be doing for Kei, in our house, in our care.” Akaashi cut off, hand reaching across the table to grab Akiteru’s. A silent plea for understanding. 

And what felt like all of a sudden, Akiteru’s wall dropped, his gaze dropped, and he smiled. 

“Gods, I don’t know why I still doubt you guys sometimes. Really, I don’t.” Akiteru let out a laugh as if he thought his own precautions about his brother’s partners were foolish. 

“Alright, I’ll answer any of your questions, go ahead and shoot!” He said. 

Akaashi was the first to recover from what felt like a whiplash of emotions. 

“The door thing, what’s all that about?”

“Well, when we were little the house was always quiet. Back then...when our dad was around. He liked the house quiet and during the warm months when Kei had the fan in his window that back door issue would happen. It became a habit to warn everyone else in the house when the door was gonna slam since it was always so...quiet.” Akiteru explained, face growing dark when bringing up the long-gone Tsukishima senior. 

“It that the same reason for the music?” asked Bokuto, voice serious as the conversation seemed. 

Akiteru nodded. “Yeah, mom grew up with four older sisters, she hates when it’s quiet and so over the years me and Kei indulge her with playing our own music. Just so she doesn’t feel so bad. But...I know Kei likes it too.” 

“And the late-night eating?” Kuroo questioned.

“Actually, that could be something you guys can do back home. Kei’s always had a small appetite but at night he just becomes this bottomless pit, really, I was lucky to notice it because he rarely acts on it. Back when we were patching our relationship back up, every night I would leave bed for water and I would stop by Kei’s room to give him a snack. Just something small and pretty soon it led to us just eating a whole meal in the middle of the night.”

Akaashi, Bokuto, and Kuroo nodded. 

“Okay, late-night appetite, that’s something new but totally workable!” Bokuto cheered, obviously happy the semi-serious conversation. 

Akaashi sighed before reaching down to grab both his boyfriends hands. “Thank you, for explaining all this to us, for helping us understand Kei better.”

Akiteru waved a hand at him in dismissal. “It’s no big deal, really!” and almost like the worlds worst timing, the front door opened. Kei and Hikaru-san spilling into the entrance with bags of groceries in their arms. 

“We’re home! It’s time for crepes!” Hikaru-san cheered, a less enthusiastic Kei behind her.

All the boys then shot up from the floor to help them. Equally as excited for crepes as Hikaru-san. 

… 

When they all returned back to their shared apartment the following week a bluetooth speaker was bought and placed on the living room coffee table.

Kei never said anything about it but the boys all noticed when the speakers name was changed from the factory ‘BLTHSP-01’ to ‘AkBoKrTsk Livingroom Speaker’.

Kei also never said anything about the purchase of a mini-fridge in their room but they all also noticed when it started to slowly fill with snacks. (All of them of course regularly disappearing daily as  _ someone _ ate away.) 

Kei never said anything but they all knew he appreciated it in the little ways he gave kisses longer in the mornings and the soft smiles he gave when his music filled their apartment.

(And with the happier Kei became the more thanks and prayers towards Akiteru were sent.)


	3. III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That One Time when Tsuki had an Emergency and Bokuto was Left in Charge for One Hour and Almost Lost It Until the Rest Of the Ot4 Came Home from Work to Help Him and Call Akiteru.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not gonna lie folks this one is very very long. I almost wept when I first finished it and looked back at the doc and saw it was fourteen (14) pages long! this is the longest chapter I've ever wrote and the whole time I was typing away like "lalala this is fun :) it might be a little short tho!"
> 
> I really hope you all enjoy!
> 
> comments and kudos are super appreciated and bring me undying joy!
> 
> reminder: my work is NOT beta read (due to me having no friends) so any mistakes you find please message me about them!

**no.3**

Bokuto had been having the worse day. For starters, he woke up 40 minutes late to practice meaning he had no time for good-morning-cuddles from his boyfriends and had to instead make do with quick ‘get out the door’ pecks to his cheek. (Oh, and he missed breakfast but he felt that wasn’t as important as the cuddles.)

It was only by the time he got to the gymnasium did he also realise he forgot the lunch Kuroo always packed him for after practice and the long bus ride to his job at the city gym. It left him starving and having to make do with a store-bought sandwich from the convenience store next to his work.

Even worse, work felt like  _ hours _ , though Bokuto knew it was hours but it usually never felt like it. Due to him having fun pumping up his students as a fitness coach and helping them reach their goals. And today it instead just dragged on, sucking at his energy and overall vibe. He felt like his time with his students was doubled, thirty minutes feeling like hours, not to their own faults though he might add. Just the way the day was going.

And then the frosting on the cake, it started pouring an hour before his shift was over. The hour before he had to leave for his walk to the bus stop he prayed it would lighten up. While praying he also started to berate himself for not bringing an umbrella, Tsukishima’s voice ringing in his head, reprimanding him. ‘Remember your umbrella Koutarou, at this point I’m surprised you haven’t caught hypothermia yet.’ the Tsukishima in his head nagged. 

Once he was faced head-on with the still continuous downpour at the end of his shift the Tsukishima in his head was also joined by Akaashi. Voice equally as nagging, ‘If you would remember your umbrella once and awhile maybe you wouldn’t have to come home soaking wet and ruining our hardwood floors so often, Bokuto-san.’ Bokuto at least knew if Kuroo was with him he would’ve encouraged the ‘fun’ run in the rain to the bus stop.

Bokuto just shook his head before deciding letting himself be berated by his in-head boyfriends would do nothing now against the blankets of rain in front of him. He opened the doors of the gym before taking off in a sprint to the bus stop. 

He surprisingly arrived at the bus stop covering fifteen minutes earlier than he normally did but still drenched. His sports windbreaker starting to feel like a sheet of ice against his body. He was lucky the bus-driver had the shitty heater on because Bokuto was convinced it was the only thing keeping him from freezing the whole ride. 

… 

Bokuto let his daydream of a nice hot bath, preferably with his boyfriends, be interrupted by the screeching and lurching of the bus finally halting at his stop. Quickly grabbing his gym bag he rushed down the aisle, giving a small wave to the bus driver he was pretty sure didn’t like him, and stepped into...the rain. 

‘God-fucking-shit’ Bokuto cursed in his head as he started once again to make a run for it in the onslaught of rainfall. His normal five-minute walk to his shared apartment was obviously cut short as he let his legs carry himself as fast as they could, jumping over puddles and weaving through pedestrians and umbrellas. 

Once he reached his apartment complex he rushed under the cover of the building overpass, happy that the complex had a covered corridor before reaching the apartment door. Keeping him safe from the cold biting rain. 

Bokuto took a moment to catch his breath, the multiple rain-induced sprints not taking a lot out of him but still tiring him to an extent. Looking around while taking back control over his breathing all of a sudden Bokuto’s gaze caught on...what is he doing there?

Outside of the corridor in the freezing rain was a very tall, blonde-haired, boy. Clad in nothing but a soaked turtle-neck baby blue sweater and skinny jeans. Looking closer Bokuto could see the boy’s glasses were dripping water with the number of raindrops hitting his lenses but his figure stayed still against the many discomforts. It was, Tsukishima. 

Bokuto felt his mouth drop open at the realization that his boyfriend was standing unmoving in the rain, zoned out beyond anything he could understand. He slowly made way towards his boyfriend, walking back into the pouring rain. Tsukishima was standing right outside the end of the corridor, not even ten feet away from the apartment door. But yet he was, outside, in the rain. Something Bokuto couldn’t manage to wrap his head around. 

The closer he got the more he noticed. By Tsukishima’s feet was a forgotten grocery bag, filled with various vegetables and a box of noodles (was it Tsukishima’s turn to cook dinner tonight?). He could see the water dripping off Tsukishima’s hair, the light blonde now a muted sandy tone and clinging to his wet forehead in gentle curls. And he could also see the harsh pink colour Tsukishima’s skin had turned under the cold.

“Tsuki? Ar-Are you okay?” Bokuto asked quietly, hoping he could still be heard over the pouring rain. Slowly reaching his arms up he softly took one of Tsukishima’s hands (God, they were  _ burning _ cold). 

Moving around a little Bokuto tried to align himself to look at where Tsukishima was gazing. He frowned when his eyes finally locked in on it. 

A dead bird.

The poor thing looked young, and Bokuto quickly realised it was a baby dove. Bokuto couldn’t figure out what kinda exact breed it was but he was pretty sure it was a dove. 

Bokuto though quickly turned back to his dazed boyfriend, a million questions running through his mind as he held tighter on Tsukishima’s hand. 

“Kei?” Bokuto asked again, though this time he attempted to sound sterner. 

His given name seemed to reach him this time as Tsukishima’s gaze became focused, eyes finally moving again to look around himself. The first thing he did, other than glance around, was  _ shiver _ . Bokuto couldn’t help but wince as Tsukishima seemed to suddenly jerk, body then catching up with the feeling of stiffing cold. 

Tsukishima turned to look at Bokuto and then the forgotten grocery bag at his feet. 

“Why am I out here?” Tsukishima’s voice seemed raw and scratchy, only making Bokuto feel more and more worried at the state of his partner. 

“I-I’m not sure, babe. I do think we should get inside though.” And with that Bokuto reached down to grab the grocery bag (the cardboard package of the noodles was soggy and wet) and kept hold of Tsukishima’s still freezing hand. Rushing the taller boy out of the rain and instead towards the apartment door. 

Even though Bokuto didn’t want to show it as he was unlocking the front door, he was  _ scared _ . He was honest to God scared as shit. And most of all he was worried. How long was Tsukishima actually out there? The groceries were soaked as well as his clothes. What was up with the spacing out? He had done that before, been lost in thought almost brain dead to the world but never had it been a danger like today. Lost in his own brain as his body suffered on the outside. 

Bokuto was cursing the fact that he knew Akaashi was working late tonight, working a little overtime since his team had finally gotten a new manga series approved. Not to mention Bokuto was sure Kuroo wouldn’t be home for at least a couple more hours, his normal 10 to 6 schedule. He really could not believe the three normally responsible and prepared people out of the four were at work (or currently not all there) leaving himself in charge. 

Him, the one who never in his life knew what was going on half the time. What was he going to do? Actually, he thought as he finally unlocked the door and pulled Tsukishima along with him into the apartment. What would Akaashi do? His other boyfriends?

Bokuto let himself stand in the doorway for a second as he let the question roll around in his brain. If Bokuto had let himself stand out in the rain too long Akaashi would… grab a towel and get him changed! And Kuroo would maybe start a… warm bath! But Tsukishima would say, ‘Maybe get him undressed first?’ in his normal sarcastic bite, making sure everyone was on track. ‘Yes SIR! Hey, hey, hey, I am a genius!’ he thought as he set the groceries down as well as his gym bag.

Bokuto let a self-satisfied smile fill his face as he came to a conclusion. Kicking off his shoes at the genkan and motioning for Tsukishima to do the same. Tsukishima still seemed to be in a bit of a trance, moving like he was on autopilot. 

“We’re gonna take a bath.” Bokuto said, grabbing Tsukishima by the waist and steering him into their shared master bedroom. 

Quickly as he could without bothering Tsukishima’s apparent daze he stripped off his own soaking wet clothes as well as his boyfriends. Taking their wet clothes to then throw into the dryer. Tsukishima said nothing about the apparent nakedness of them both, though another violent shiver wrecked through him again.

Walking into the bathroom Bokuto started the bathwater, pouring in the strawberry scented bubble bath solution he knew Tsukishima liked once it reached halfway full. (Akaashi’s always super thoughtful, I’m sure he would’ve done the same thing.)

Pulling Tsukishima along, Bokuto sat in the tub, placing Tsukishima in between his legs and leaning him back against Bokuto’s chest. Bokuto watched as the sudden warm water turned Tsukishima’s skin a more healthy shade of pink but frowned as he noticed Tsukishima start to shake. Forceful shivers still wrecking through him every five minutes. 

Bokuto could do nothing but rub his hand soothingly across Tsukishima’s sides, scooping up some of the warm water in his free hand and pouring it on his unsubmerged skin. Murmuring small compliments like he normally did when he was doting on his partners. 

“I love you.”

“You’re so beautiful, did I tell you that today?”

“Your skin is so soft, I think it’s cute.”

“Your hair goes a little curly when it’s wet, very very pretty.”

Tsukishima didn’t respond in words but he softly hummed to show he was listening and appreciative of the small actions. Bokuto placed small kisses along Tsukishima’s neck and shoulders, watching as the shakes and shivers gradually disappeared with time.

… 

Once the water had turned lukewarm Bokuto figured it was about time to get out. Helping Tsukishima out of the tub he watched the younger boy let out a small yawn. Bokuto smiled and chuckled at it, placing a kiss on his nose in response. 

Tsukishima only rolled his eyes exaggeratedly but smiled sleepily as well. Letting Bokuto wrap him in a towel. He seemed to be over his earlier daze, now responding in his usual sarcasm and witty retorts. Bokuto couldn’t be happier to see his boyfriend back to normal. Celebrating in his head and chanting ‘I did that! Look at that eye roll and smile! I did that!’.

It was only once they reached the bedroom and started to get dressed did Bokuto think to ask any questions. He had decided in the tub that he didn’t want to make his boyfriend uncomfortable and instead was going to wait until Tsukishima had more space. 

Bokuto had grabbed a pair of what he assumed was Kuroo’s grey sweatpants (since the drawstring was missing, something that all of Kuroo’s sweatpants shared) and slipped on his own plain shirt and neon pink sweatshirt. (A sweatshirt equally despised by most of his boyfriends.)

Looking over he saw that Tsukishima had pulled on an emerald green oversized hoodie, the logo on the chest saying something about ‘Sendai Zoo’, something Bokuto was ninety percent sure was his and a pair of biking shorts that he knew Tsukishima only bought because he and Akaashi thought they were comfortable. 

Once Tsukishima was dressed Bokuto took his hands and led them both to the bed. Slipping under the covers, as well as a couple of blankets to keep out the cold, Bokuto let Tsukishima turn in his arms to be held. Tsukishima then wiggled a little further down so his head could rest against Bokuto’s chest. 

Bokuto pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead. 

“Can we talk about it?” He asked quietly, though he didn’t know why. No one was home except him and Tsukishima but in the intimacy of their own room, in their own company, he felt the urge to keep down his volume.

“I guess, to be honest, I’m actually… not sure what happened.” Tsukishima replied, he was just as quiet as Bokuto though was almost slurring from his sleepiness.

Bokuto frowned. “What do you mean? What did you do today, ya’know, before.”

Tsuksihima let out a sigh, closing his eyes and resting his head against Bokuto’s chest, almost like he was hiding his face but Bokuto didn’t say a word about it.

“I woke up and first helped Kuroo with breakfast and packing lunches, which by the way, I’m aware you forgot yours this morning.” Tsukishima punctuated with a hard poke of his finger to Bokuto’s chest where he laid. Bokuto let out a small chuckle at the call out, heat rushing to his cheeks. 

“Yeah, I woke up pretty late this morning.” Bokuto explained.

“I figured. Today I had the day off, the archival crew was moving some pieces from storage so we weren’t needed, once the boys left for work I thought I would go to the store for dinner. I walked there, it was cloudy but It wasn’t raining yet… and then I was home… and-and I saw that bird on the sidewalk… and I, spaced out I think.” Tsukishima started to trail off, trying to recall his own memories. 

Bokuto let his hand start to softly rub Tsukishima’s back. Trying to comfort as best he could in a situation he wasn’t sure he understood at all. 

“Do you remember when it started raining?” He asked but Tsukishima just shook his head.

“It wasn’t raining yet when I got home, maybe...just sprinkling a little.” Bokuto nodded at the explanation, pressing another kiss to the boy’s forehead. 

“You should take a nap, I’ll join you.” 

…

Bokuto couldn’t imagine falling asleep with his lover. He had too many thoughts running through his mind. More questions he didn’t have the heart to ask. As he laid with the blonde boy in his arms it wasn’t long before Bokuto could feel Tsukishima’s breathing even out and his body go limp in his hold. He figured the boy must have been exhausted, standing out there for… so long.

‘How long was it really?’ He wondered. He was soaked but he said he got home when it was sprinkling. It had started raining a full hour before his shift was over. With the bus ride, Bokuto didn’t get home until it had been raining for at least two and a half hours. Was he out there for two hours? 

Two hours?

… 

The opening of the front door woke Bokuto up from his spiralling thoughts. He didn’t really fall asleep but he definitely spaced out, the quiet of his passed out boyfriend left him with nothing to focus on but the questions that ran through his mind. 

Carefully, Bokuto untangled his and Tsukishima’s limbs. Slipping out of the covers as quietly and sneakily as he could. Chanting silent prayers that the lighter sleeper of the two would stay snoozing.

Once Bokuto managed to open and slip out the bedroom door he let out a sigh of relief. Looking up he almost immediately made eye-contact with his other partner. 

Kuroo had taken off his suit jacket and had the sleeves of his button-up rolled up his tan forearms. He was standing in the hallway leading to their bedroom, shoes kicked off and looking exhausted but most of all relieved to be home. 

“Hey Bo, where’s Tsuki?” Kuroo asked, eyes glancing at the then closed bedroom door. 

Bokuto tried to smile but he knew it fell short. Kuroo quickly scooped Bokuto in his arms, letting the man fall against his hold with a sigh. 

“What happened? Did you guys fight?” Kuroo asked, pressing kisses to Bokuto’s forehead and cheeks. Trying to comfort his boyfriend. Bokuto shook his head in response. 

“You know, when sometimes we’ll all be in the living room or hanging out and then Tsuki will just… you know, blank out for a little while?” Bokuto started. 

Kuroo slowly pulled away from his hold on Bokuto, making eye contact and raising an eyebrow at the weird question. “Yeah, why?”

“Well, he did that today but… it was bad Kuroo. Dude, it was really bad.” Bokuto felt his anxiousness rise as he continued to look at Kuroo. Hoping maybe Kuroo could read through the lines so he didn’t have to relive this afternoon but he knew that wasn’t how things worked.

“What happened Bo?” Kuroo pleaded, his own worry becoming apparent.

“I came home from work and it had been raining for hours but he was… outside Kuroo. Just spaced out and standing in the rain.” Bokuto explained. 

Kuroo let his apparent shock be written on his face. “Fo-For how long? How long was he out there?”

Bokuto shook his head. He didn’t want to answer. He really, really, really didn’t want to answer.

“About two hours.”

Kuroo audibly gasped. “Shit. Really?”

Bokuto nodded. “I took him inside after that, he was still a little spacey but we took a bath and the shivering went down...God, he was so cold Kuroo. He felt like ice.”

Kuroo nodded, his eyes falling to look at the floor. 

“He’s knocked out now, we laid down for a nap but I couldn’t fall asleep. It was so scary, I’m not gonna lie Kuroo, it really was terrifying. I had no idea what to do.” Bokuto explained, his voice growing tight and wavering. 

Kuroo pulled him in again, shushing him tenderly. “It’s okay Bo, you did a really good job taking care of him, I’m extremely proud and I’m sure Tsuki and Akaashi are too.” 

… 

Tsukishima stayed passed out even past when Akaashi got home. 

Akaashi immediately knew something was wrong the moment the apartment door opened in front of him. Yes, he was tired, exhausted from his workday, and extremely just looking forward to a nice meal with affection from his boyfriends but the sight in front of him had adrenaline kicking in. His own body sensing something was wrong, absolutely wrong.

Bokuto was seated at the kitchen table wearing the atrocious neon hoodie Akaashi hated with a passion but the thing was, he wasn’t doing anything. Bokuto had nothing in his hands but Kuroo’s own and his eyes were trained ahead of himself, staring too intensely at the hung photo on the wall across from his seat. 

Kuroo himself looked a little worse for wear, sitting next to Bokuto, he was still dressed in his work clothes and busying himself with a sloppily made sandwich. (Akaashi assumed Bokuto had made it for him.)

Akaashi couldn’t help but notice Tsukishima was missing. He knew the boy had a day off from work, they had talked about it that morning. 

“What happened?” Akaashi demanded, wasting no time and cutting straight to the point. Bokuto was knocked out of his thoughts and gave a soft smile, Kuroo did the same.

“Hi ‘Kaashi.” Bokuto greeted, motioning Akaashi to join them at the table. Akaashi kicked off his shoes and dropped his work bag by the door, sensing that whatever happened was over but a discussion was needed.

“Where’s Kei?” He charged, becoming frustrated his questions weren’t being answered. 

Kuroo quickly picked up on Akaashi’s disgruntled behaviour and moved a hand to hold his own.

“He’s taking a nap, he’s been sleeping for a bit.” Bokuto explained, fidgeting with the strings of his sweatshirt. 

“Kei had… you know when sometimes we’re all hanging out and then Kei does that spacing out thing?” Kuroo asked.

Oh no, oh shit. “Yeah, dissociating.” Akaashi answered, anxiety building in his chest.

“Well, when Bo came home from work earlier today he found Kei… spaced out, standing in the rain and halfway to freezing to death. He had done that thing but this time it was bad, it took him forever to come out of it.” Kuroo further explained, glancing at Bokuto’s fidgeting form.

“Holy shit, was he okay? Did he need to go to the hospital? It was raining all afternoon.” Kuroo shook his head as he nudged Bokuto in a silent plea to answer Akaashi himself.

“He was… so out of it and soaked. He looked like he had taken a shower in his clothes, really. I tried to remember what you guys would do if  _ I _ got caught in the rain and tried my best to help, I felt so…  _ helpless _ . I had no clue what I was doing.” Akaashi reached out and grabbed Bokuto’s hand as a silent way to comfort him. 

“I took him inside, we dried off, and then we took a bath together. Once the water was getting cold again his shivering went down and he stopped spacing out. We got dressed and I asked him how long he thought he was out there, what he was doing before.” Bokuto trailed off like he didn’t want to repeat but Akaashi tried to urge him to continue in his stare.

“He said after everyone left to work he walked to the grocery store, bought some food, and on the way home he saw… this dove, dead on the sidewalk. And then after that, he said he just spaced out. He didn’t really come to until after the bath when he was warm again.” Akaashi gave Bokuto a small smile, rubbing his thumb over his knuckles soothingly. Kuroo did the same with his other hand. 

“You did amazing Koutarou, really. You took care of him so well.” Kuroo nodded alongside Akaashi’s praise. 

“I was thinking maybe we should call Akiteru-san, this… dissociating thing is getting kinda bad and I think we should learn more about it.” Kuroo spoke up, squaring his shoulders as if presenting his idea to his work colleagues. 

Akaashi shook his head in agreement. 

…

“Hello Akiteru-san, are you busy at this moment?” Akaashi asked after the ringing of the phone went through, indicating it was answered. 

“Uh-yes, I just got done with dinner actually. Can I help you?” 

“Today, Kei had a… incident regarding his dissociating attacks. We wanted to know about any information regarding them.” 

There was shuffling heard over the phone. 

“Ye-yeah okay, um, what happened?”

“He spaced out while standing in the rain, no one was home so he was out there for… a while. He’s fine now though.” Akaashi reassured. 

“Oh damn, okay. What questions do you have?”

“I guess we might as well start with when they started.”

“Uh, real quick, am I on speakerphone?”

“... Yes, is that a problem?”

“Oh, no, I was just making sure so I don’t have to repeat anything so...um.”

“When did they start Akiteru-san?”

“I-I’m not really sure, I only noticed when I was in middle school. Me and Kei have a five-year difference so he was just starting school back then. When he would get in trouble with our dad he would just go… limp. He would act like he was on autopilot and respond the way he knew he had to, and once our dad would leave him alone he would just… stare off into nothing.”

“So it started whenever Mr.Tsukishima-san would… scold him?”

“Please, don’t call him that. He’s actually not a Tsukishima, him and our mother divorced when Kei started middle school. We… are no longer in contact with him, but yes, basically. I think it honestly started off as a… protective mechanism of sorts.”

“He needed… protection from your father?”

“Kei’s sharp wit and speech had to have come from someone, and that someone was our dad. I think when it would get too much for him he would just… retreat into his own head.”

“But… it hasn’t happened that way with us. it happens when it’s too quiet or when we’re not even here so how does it work now?”

“Then maybe it’s just when he reminds himself of our dad.”

“That might make sense.”

“I’d really like to help more but, that gap in our lives when I left for college and our relationship got bad was also when his dissociating changed. I’m not sure how it works anymore or even how to pull him out of it.”

“No, no, no, thank you. It cleared up some things for us, your explanations helped. Thank you, Akiteru-san.”

“Uh, okay, it was no problem.”

“Thank you again, Akiteru-san.”

“Really, it’s no problem, I could talk about my little brother forever ya’know. Have a good night boys!” Akiteru let out a sheepish laugh and with that, the call disconnected.

…

Tsukishima woke up with the feeling of warmth all around himself. In his head, it was expected, with a total of three boyfriends who all ran warm he could forget about ever being cold. 

When his feet got cold at night he would press them against Bokuto’s warm calves. When his hands got cold he would run them up Akaashi’s back (and despite the normal sarcastic retorts of his hands feeling like ice Akaashi always let him). And when his heart would grow cold ( _ scared _ ) and his cynicism and wit would reach hurtful levels he could always expect Kuroo to talk him down and pull him into a hug despite whatever he may have said. All of his boyfriends always kept him  _ warm _ . He could honestly never complain. 

Opening his eyes slowly he was surprised to find that he was… alone. The bed was entirely empty and the warmth just simply came from the, wow, five blankets that were piled on top of himself. Tsukishima rolled his eyes at the thought that all five were probably Bokuto’s idea. A sweetheart really but if he had done this to anyone else Tsukishima was 100% sure they would have suffered heatstroke. 

Looking around the room he noticed the sun was setting outside their window, the room turning a warm orange. Tsukishima took a couple moments to slip on his glasses and watch the dust dancing in the sunrays before peeling off the blankets. 

Wakendness finally setting in as he tried his best to escape the bed Tsukishima started to wonder about his partners. Had they eaten yet? It was his turn to make dinner. The sun was just setting so all of them should be home by now. Why weren’t any of them in the bed with him when he woke up? He laid down with Bokuto, right? God, he was so tired before he went down for a nap, he barely remembers falling asleep. 

Carefully making his way to the bedroom door he slipped out, walking silently down the hallway to the kitchen and living room. 

“Tsuki! You’re awake!” Bokuto cheered, basically jumping in his seat at the dining table where Kuroo and Akaashi were also seated.

“Yeah, I just needed a rest. Have you guys eaten yet? It was my night to make dinner so I’m surprised I haven’t heard any complaints from the endless stomach trio.” Tsukishima asked. He watched as his boyfriends’ faces went into a panic at the question.

“No! No need, we ate sandwiches cause you were so tired and we were so hungry so don’t even bother with it really we don’t care that you needed a nap itwasnobigdeal!” Bokuto rambled to an almost hilarious extent while Akaashi simply shook his head ‘no’. 

“You’re in your work clothes, Kuroo, Akaashi? Were you guy’s waiting for me to get up?” Tsukishima asked, walking closer to the dining room table. 

“We didn’t want to wake you up, we were… worried.” Kuroo answered kindly, reaching a hand out to hold Tsukishima’s and to pull him closer to the table to take a seat. 

“What’s...going on?” Tsukishima asked blankly, never one to sugar coat. 

“We, um, well-” Bokuto sputtered out before Akaashi raised a hand, indicating him to stop and let him handle the question instead.

“We wanted to talk about your dissociating episode today. Now we don’t mean to corner you into talking about anything you’re not comfortable with but also know we have already asked Akiteru-san about any information he could share. We just want you to be honest as we are with you.” Akaashi explained as Kuroo and Bokuto nodded along. 

Kuroo reached his arm to rest it on the back of Tsukishima’s shoulders in what he hoped was a comforting way, rubbing gently against Tsukishima’s sweatshirt clad arm. 

Tsukishima felt himself go stiff despite the well thought out affection and kind questioning. He appreciated his boyfriends always being so patient with himself. They knew his mental health was an ever going issue that he worked hard on every single day and respected what was their knowledge to know and what was not. 

But, old habits die hard and Tsukishima’s mind was killing him to bite back. To shift the attention off himself. Say that it wasn’t a big deal, that he shouldn’t have to explain himself. To throw a fit like a child because he never got to be one. 

He knew it wasn’t right. 

So he fought a battle he hoped to win against his own brain, an internal struggle the men at the table sympathised with but knew all they could offer was encouraging looks towards the blonde. 

“I-I… okay.”

… 

It was only a start to beginning to understand Tsukishima’s mental health struggles but Kuroo, Bokuto, and Akaashi could only thank their own stubbornness and the help of Akiteru-san. A brother that no matter what, just wanted to help his little brother and his boyfriends. 

(And those boyfriends and little brother couldn’t be happier.)


	4. IV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That One Time When Akiteru Was Like 'Baby Photos? How About a Tsukishima Museum Haul'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been so excited and nervous to post this chapter, I really hope you guys like it and such! this fic is slowly coming to an end with the fifth part finished and the last one just being drafted and I just want to say thank you for all those who have left comments and kudos. the feedback on this work has really been the thing keeping me motivated to finish and update so often. these next parts though will probably never get longer than that third part ( I have no idea what I was on to make me type a chapter that long ) but I hope you all still enjoy this one!
> 
> comments and kudos are appreciated and feed my ego!
> 
> reminder: my work is NOT beta read (due to me having no friends) so any mistakes you find please message me about them!

**no.4**

Kuroo hadn’t expected a sudden day off work. He had actually completely forgotten about the upcoming work holiday, failing to tell anyone of his boyfriends. Boyfriends who all did not apparently have the same work holiday leaving Kuroo home alone in the company of their shared couch and Disney+ subscription. 

Without his boyfriends, at this stage of life, Kuroo didn’t really have any other… friends to talk to. Kenma was out running a goddamn company while following around his worldwide volleyball-brained boyfriend. He didn’t really keep in contact with any of his old teammates (unless for the yearly reunion party) and at this point, the only other people he talked to daily were his co-workers. All whom he assumed were spending their holiday with friends, something Kuroo was starting to realise he didn’t have (other than the obvious ‘my partners are my best friends’). 

Coming to this conclusion Kuroo was expecting to spend his day mostly alone until one by one his partners started to trail in the door from their tiring workday.

Kuroo hadn’t been expecting a call, much less one from the older brother of his youngest partner. 

Watching his phone buzz across the coffee table in front of him he gazed at the caller id screen with confusion clearly written on his face. (Akiteru’s contact picture being a photo the older boy had sent Kuroo when first giving him his number, both hands held up in peace signs while standing in front of a Calpis vending machine. His contact name flashing ‘Aki-chan’ on the screen as well.)

Near the last ring, Kuroo accepted the call.

“Kuroo? Are you guys home? Akaashi didn’t pick up my call.” Kuroo let out a laugh at the blunt explanation of why Akiteru would ever call him. 

“Oh-ho-ho, I see how it is! It’s rude to tell a girl she’s your second option Aki-nii!” Kuroo joked.

Akiteru laughed in response, short and sweet. “Well Akaashi always picks up my calls so he’s always the first option, Kei and Bokuto are always last. To be honest I don’t think Kei has ever picked up one of my calls before if I don’t text him why first.”

Kuroo chuckled harshly, knowing Tsukishima he knew Akiteru wasn’t lying. 

Akiteru soon drifted back on the topic of his original intentions to call. “I’m assuming it’s just you home today, right?”

“Yep, got a work holiday off but none of the other boys had one. Just me and-” Kuroo squinted at the pause screen of his movie. 

“Uh, the Aristo-cats.” He finished. 

Akiteru laughed again. “Well, I actually have the same work holiday off and decided to do some very late spring cleaning, and while looking through some old boxes I found the Tsukishima Photo Books! I was dead convinced Kei had burned them or given them to Tadashi but turns out I had them the whole time!”

Kuroo perked up at the words ‘Photo Book’. “We’ve actually never seen childhood photos of Tsuki.”

The more Kuroo thought about it the more he knew he was right. Kuroo could remember the embarrassment of when he first brought his boyfriends to visit his father and older sister. The two pulling up every childhood photo to have ever been taken to show his partners. He also remembered that similar enough, the same thing happened when Bokuto introduced them to his parents and Akaashi with his grandparents. 

(Bokuto’s family photos were hilarious and chaotic, him being a very rowdy child and never being able to sit still long enough for a good photo. Most pictures of him actually being just a blur of messy black hair and wrinkled backwards clothes. Akaashi’s family photos were more...classy. His grandparents having photo’s of all his firsts as well as the same yearly recreated photo of his ‘first day of school’ for each grade. Akaashi as a child was mature and refined, traits he picked up from having guardians much older than the average parent. Kuroo already knew his were embarrassing and to an extent, creepy. Kuroo’s sister and father could never sneak a candid photo of him all his years of living, if he was in a photo he was making dead eye contact with the camera. Tsukishima was the first one to point it out when they had been going through them, all of them laughing but also nervously chuckling about it. Kuroo’s stare having always been intense. When Tsukishima introduced them to his mother and older brother there had been no photos, and back then no one had the courage to ask.) 

“Yeah, we’ve never been a family much for photos. We might have... uh-maybe four photos of all three of us together? No big deal, anyway, I’ll be stopping by to drop them off with you guys. I’m sure you’ll all love them, Kei was a cute kid, not to mention I wasn’t so bad lookin’ myself!” Akiteru joked lightheartedly, his casual deflection and excuse not going unnoticed by Kuroo.

“Okay! Sounds good, I’ll be seein’ you soon Aki-nii!” and with that, the line dropped.

… 

Kuroo sat himself down on the living room floor with the box. Akiteru had dropped it off and left quick, an explanation of ‘I have a lunch date with a friend and I’m totally running late!’ on his tongue as he practically fled from the apartment doorstep. Now, with Kuroo alone with the box, he realised there wasn’t just photo books but VHS tapes, SIM cards, and yearbooks inside that the older had failed to mention. 

This wasn’t just the ‘Tsukishima Family Photo Book Collection’, it was the whole fucking ‘Tsukishima Family  _ Archive _ ’.

Kuroo spent hours after this revelation looking for the proper supplies so they could go through it  _ all _ that night. He walked down to apartment B16, where an older lady they called Amai-san lived, to borrow her VCR for the VHS tapes. As well as dug through the box for every tiny SIM card and loaded all 5 of them onto his laptop. 

By the time evening rolled around and Bokuto threw himself through the front door Kuroo had set up the VCR to the TV and had 98% of the SIM cards loaded. 

“Woaaah, what’s all this Testu?” Bokuto exclaimed as he peeked into the box still full with photo books and yearbooks, clearly curious.

Kuroo grinned pridefully at the question, damn near preening at his boyfriend. “Akiteru-san dropped off some family photos and shit, I was setting us all up to look at ‘em once everyone’s home.”

Bokuto cheered as he stuck his finger in and out of the VHS flap on the VCR, turning to give Kuroo a rather passionate kiss for four in the afternoon. (But Kuroo didn’t complain.) Bokuto tasted like sweat, mackerel, and the rice he ate for lunch but as the kiss soon turned into an impromptu make-out session it faded into just the taste of spit.

Bokuto ended it by pressing a chaste peck to Kuroo’s lips before he pulled away, laughing that Kuroo didn’t have to pretend to not be disgusted by his post-lunch-breathe and that he was going to shower and brush his teeth. 

If Kuroo joined him in the shower only minutes later it was nobodies business but the four men who shared the apartment. 

… 

When Akaashi arrived home an hour later it was with Tsukishima in tow. Both men debating over something neither Kuroo nor Bokuto could understand as they piled through the door. Once their shoes were kicked off and Akaashi’s work bag was thrown to the floor they stopped discussing and turned to the other two men on the couch and the large box in their living room.

“Well barbarians, which one of you brought the box?” asked Tsukishima.

“And on a scale of one to ten how pissed are we gonna be once we see what’s in it?” Akaashi added, hand already moving to rest on his hip in a disappointed manner. 

Bokuto whined loudly as Kuroo laughed at the already annoyed glares their boyfriends were shooting their way. 

“Akaaashiii! Tsukiiii! It’s nothing bad! We promise!” Bokuto whined as he threw himself on the ground next to the box, basically grovelling at his partner’s feet. 

Kuroo then pulled himself off the couch as well, moving to the box and picking up one of the photo books. Akaashi raised a singular eyebrow in response as he stepped over Bokuto to inspect the box, throwing Tsukishima his work jacket as the younger moved aside into the bedroom to put it away.

“Akiteru-san dropped off the box, it has all the Tsukishima family photos and videos.” explained Kuroo as Akaashi started to file through the multiple books and VHS tapes lining the bottom of the box. 

“Wow, it really is all of them. I don’t even think my grandparents have this many.” Akaashi commented as Bokuto slowly made his way over to the box with them. 

“So what’s the box for again?” asked Tsukishima as he made his way back into the living room area, hanging up his museum employee badge by the door.

“Your family photos, actually.” snarked Kuroo as he watched a look of surprise wash over the blonde-haired man’s face. 

“I-I, really? I thought my mother put them in storage or gave them to Yama. Who had them?” Tsukishima asked, shockingly not flustered or angry that his childhood photos were now out in the open for his boyfriends to see and make fun of (lightheartedly of course).

“Akiteru-san dropped them off!” Bokuto supplied as Tsukishima joined him on the floor, resting his head on his shoulder. 

“Oh, okay.” Tsukishima stated quite plainly to the shock of everyone in the room. 

“You-You’re not embarrassed or anything that we’re gonna be going through them? Or angry that Akiteru-san dropped them off without telling you?” Kuroo asked quite incredulously, mouth gaping almost like a fish.

“Not really, they’re just photo’s of when I was little. It’s not like they’re middle school or high school photos. Those I would be quite pissed off about but these are just… childhood moments.” Tsukishima stated calmly, letting his eyes shut as he leaned against Bokuto.

Akaashi moved closer and softly slipped off Tsukishima’s glasses, placing them on the coffee table, giving him a soft peck to the nose. “There’s video’s too you know.” 

Tsukishima just shrugged in response. “Doesn’t matter, you all can watch them while I take a light nap.”

“You don’t wanna watch with us?” Bokuto asked as he settled more comfortably into the side of the couch behind so Tsukishima could rest easier against him.

Tsukishima simply shook his head. “I lived through it, why would I need to bother re-watching my own life? You all go ahead, I’m comfortable here.” A faint blush on his cheeks at the confession. 

Kuroo let out a dramatic sigh as he got up to fetch a blanket for his two lovers. 

“Promise me you’ll look at the photos with us tomorrow then, there’s some pretty funny ones of your brother I peeked at.” Kuroo prompted as he laid the blanket on top of the blonde before moving to place a kiss on his forehead.

Tsukishima nodded in response and by the time Akaashi picked out the first VHS tape he was already asleep. 

…

_ The camera pans up from the floor to eye level. Two blonde boys are sat on the Tsukishima family couch, the older of the two holding the younger in his lap. The youngest could be estimated to be about two while the older looked around seven or eight. _

“What’s today Aki baby?”  _ A woman’s voice coos behind the camera.  _

“It’s Kei’s birthday! He’s turning two today and today is also the day of the Harvest Moon! The first full moon in September!”  _ Akiteru cheered though was steady to keep a hold of the smaller boy in his lap.  _

_ Soon enough though the boy started to squirm, beginning to pout and whine. Akiteru stayed determined though and instead of letting Kei wiggle out of his hold he picked him up and simply moved him to sit next to him instead. _

“Kei’s only two and so independent, he never lets me hold him for too long.”  _ Akiteru pouted though began to silently play with Kei, bringing over a stuffed animal from the floor to let the toddler manhandle. _

_ Akiteru laughed as Kei took one look at the stuffed bear and threw it across the room, obviously unpleased with the toy for no apparent reason. _

_ Akiteru and the woman behind the camera chuckled lightheartedly at the violence towards the toy, only softly chastizing the two-year-old as Akiteru reached down to grab it again. Soon though Kei grew visibly more agitated and crawled back into Akiteru’s lap. Akiteru seemed shocked but welcomingly accepted his younger brother back into his arms. _

“Hey sweetheart, have you seen m-” 

_ The camera stops. _

…

“My head was in the clouds, and not a soul around.” _ A woman sings. Her tone wavers and her pitch flattens but she doesn’t stop. Swaying in the Tsukishima kitchen with a three-year-old Kei in her arms. _

“In the blossom of youth, so aloof on the roofs, of Paris.”  _ She croons, her voice cracking ever so slightly on the high note. A male voice, squeaky and young, snorts quietly at her. _

“As my bicycle flew, down the avenue, my heart did sing. Because you gave me wings, oh-oh.”  _ The woman quickly breaks into laughter as she sings, noticing the young boy behind the camera was laughing as well at her singing. _

“Please stop torturing Kei with your singing mom.” _ The boy jokes as the woman instead spins to turn away from him, humming along with the instrumental break before singing again. _

_ The camera is set down on a counter, facing the now group of three, dancing and singing in the kitchen. _

“Paris may we agree? That you can surrogate-ly, be my papa.”  _ The woman and boy sing as the younger sits up in his mothers hold, reaching his arms out for his older brother. _

_ The boy just simply smiles as he takes the smaller into his arms, spinning and dancing along with the woman. The kitchen full of smiles and laughter. _

“I was born in the arms of your sacred heart, oh-oh.”  _ They giggle as they finish the chorus and fade off.  _

_ It was subtle but all of a sudden the air turned tense, the sound of a car door shutting outside the house. _

_ The woman turns and gasps.  _ “Oh, gods, I didn’t know it was so late. I have to finish making dinner for your father. Be a good boy and run upstairs with Kei, will you?”  _ She asks though the boy knew it was a statement. _

_ The boy gives a smile that doesn’t quite meet his eyes. He moves towards the camera and grabs it quickly, the last frame of the video being kitchen tiles beneath socked feet. _

“Of course mom.”

_ The camera stops. _

…

“What was your favourite animal at the Zoo, Kei?”  _ The video starts with a young boys voice and the scene of a six-year-old Kei sat in a car seat that was already too small for his fastly growing limbs.  _

_ Kei visibly glances up at the seats in front of him but the camera doesn’t move to follow his gaze, instead coming closer as a way of encouraging the shy boy to speak.  _

“Um-I, I really liked the birds. The birdhouse was really pretty.”  _ And Kei’s voice is soft. Softer than sprinkling spring rain and sweet like the child he is. He starts to wring his hands together, not looking into the camera lens.  _

“We came to the Zoo to look at animals, not goddamn birds. Flighty fucking things, scavenge at trash and get into everything, I don’t even know why they have them at the Zoo.”  _ A grim, deep voice cuts in. His tone sharp as glass and cold as ice, unrelenting against what was the innocent and quiet tone of the six-year-old seated behind. _

_ The camera is still trained on Kei and it’s heartbreaking to watch the delicate smile drop from his face. Expression changing to show nothing at all. Blank. _

“They’re just birds, honey.”  _ A female voice says though fear is apparent in the way her words shake on ‘honey’. _

“I go out of my way for a day off to go to this damn Zoo, pay for the damn tickets, and walked around for hours and you have the fucking nerve to chastise me, woman? I paid to see the fucking animals but the demon child back there insisted on seeing those fucking birds and I was nothing but patient wasn’t I? I think I’m allowed to complain a tad if I want to,  honey .”  _ And the man’s voice was nothing but venom. Like biting wind against a traveller without a jacket. Like freezing cold rain against a boy in a baby blue sweater without an umbrella to keep him safe.  _

_ The camera moves from the spaced-out boy to look down at the floor of the car.  _

_ The camera stops. _

… 

_ It was the Tsukishima back yard ( _ there was no volleyball net nor basketball hoop _ ) and the grass was green and the sun bore down on the back of a blonde little boy. The said boy, maybe nine or ten years old, standing in front of a tree hanging over the corner of their fence.  _

_ The boy was gentle as he reached up on his tip-toes to peer into the branches. Holding onto one side of the fence to keep steady as he tried his best to look at something in the tree. _

“I think he’s looking for a birds nest, he’s been hearing chirping from that tree every morning recently.”  _ A voice behind the camera says, it’s a bit squeaky but definitely getting deeper.  _

_ Then the boy stood back, a white-feathered bird flapping out of the tree. Its feathers seemed to glow in the sun, bright white and ethereal. The beat of its wings quiet and powerful as it flew into the blue sky, only to land back down on the fence.  _

_ Only a few feet from the boy. _

_ The boy seemed excited but also hesitant at best. He moved slowly and carefully. His footing graceful as he stepped over rocks and stones while never losing eye contact with the bird. It was a scene out of a poetry book, the heavily saturated spring weather acting as a backdrop to the innocent scene played in front.  _

_ Just a boy, a bird…  _

_ and two gunshots. _

_ The camera dropped at the sudden bangs, falling sideways on the floor. The guy behind the camera rushed over to the form of the boy who had fallen to the ground. Obviously scared and obviously trembling.  _

“Kei! Are you okay?”  _ The guy asked as he brought the boy up to stand, looking over for any injuries. Whispering prayers as he found none. The only out of place detail on Kei’s form being the light blood splatter across his face. _

_ They both turned to look behind them, a bullet hole in the fence and a dead bird on the grass. _

“What the ever-living fuck was that? You could have hit Kei! He was right fucking there!”  _ The guy fumed as his eyes met with someone behind where the camera had fallen. _

“We-ell, I didn’t hit ‘em. You happy you lil’ shit.”  _ The man drawled, voice irritated and slurring.  _

_ Very, very, very drunk. _

_ The guy with a tiny whisper to Kei that the camera couldn’t catch then came running at the man. Anger burning inside him as his shoe came closer to the camera, accidentally kicking it but bringing his form and the form of the drunk man into the frame. The guy grabs onto the sides of the man’s shirt, shaking him violently. _

_ The gun falls to the floor. _

“What the hell is wrong with you? Do you care so fucking little about the life of your son? Your goddamn son?”  _ The guy yells, impersonating the very emotion of fury.  _

“I hate those fucking birds, those stupid loud-ass birds.”  _ Was the only thing the man mumbled before the guy threw him against the fence.  _

“Rot out here for all I care, just know, sober or not, you are not to take a step into this house again. I know it’s in mom’s name. I’m changing the locks and keeping my family safe. Come pick up your stuff tomorrow along with the number of mom’s lawyer.”  _ Pale, slender hands reached down around the camera. _

_ The camera stops. _

… 

They didn’t wake up Kei that night. They let him pass out against Bokuto and scooped him up when they were done with the VHS tapes. Hearts a little heavier than before.

They dressed in silence, letting each other process what was nothing but heartbreaking information. To them, the idea of a parent was always synonymous with safe, caring, loving, and home. But the man they saw was if nothing, a monster.

They felt as if they understood more. And they did. The tapes filled in many questions they had been too cautious to ask. (Why did the divorce happen? What was the last straw? Why didn’t they talk about him? Why did Kei’s dissociating attacks start? Why did the brothers seem so distant to him?)

If they all held each other a little closer that night, kissed a little longer that morning, and doted more on their youngest more than ever before (because they loved him goddamn it, he wasn’t a monster, he was lovable, he was worthy of all their care.) than it was nobodies business but theirs. 

Because they understood more, thanks to Akiteru, but at what cost?


	5. V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Ot4 Work Through Some Emotions With Big-Bro-Therapist Akiteru

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys, the work is almost over! I'm almost sad to see it end, lol keyword 'almost'. it's been really fun answering and reading comments and having time to write and love my own versions of my favourite characters. the encouragement I've gotten for this work has been awe-inspiring, to say the least. thank you sincerely to everyone who has left kudos, comments, or just silently read my work.
> 
> (p.s: how would any of you feel about a longer work for kurootsuki based on Swan Lake, plenty of ballet and plenty of plot? please comment if it interests any of you! I already have an outline and chapter done for it but I'm still iffy on posting it.)
> 
> comments and kudos ascend me to a higher being!
> 
> reminder: my work is NOT beta read (due to me having no friends) so any mistakes you find please message me about them!

**no.5**

They, as a collective (besides Tsukishima), do not like Yamaguchi Tadashi. In all honesty, they know its not the boys’ fault. They understand the rules of childhood friendship. Childhood friends can get closer than anyone, can read each other like books, know each other like the back of their hand, and are life-changingly important. 

I mean Kuroo has a childhood friend, Akaashi and Bokuto are technically each others only friends, but for some reason childhood  _ best _ friend Yamaguchi Tadashi unnerves them. 

Kuroo, Akaashi, and Bokuto all hated to admit it. They were unnerved and… jealous.

They weren’t normally jealous people. When they first all decided to become a couple there was no worry or resentment between each other. They had trust and thought being jealous over one another was only building their relationship to fail. They knew how to flow around each other, bring out the best in themselves to give the other what they wanted.

Then Tsukishima happened.

Beautiful, snarky, Ice Prince Tsukishima and his jealousy-inducing ways.

Tsukishima was a very private person, similar to Akaashi in a way. He never gave off more about himself than he needed too. Since elementary school: always letting his birthday pass without comment, leaving answers blank on class ice-breakers, and avoiding people who would pry into his life too much.

Kuroo, Akaashi, and Bokuto didn’t blame Tsukishima for his reserved ways. They assumed that was just how the boy was. Icey walls built to keep himself safe, keep others out. But now things were different.

Now it wasn’t just three, it was four. 

Now after years of dating (reserved personality still in check but slowly more comfortable), the original three were starting to notice the feeling Tsukishima was starting to rise out of them.

For the first time ever...they  _ all _ felt jealous. 

Yamaguchi, Tadashi. 

They knew a great lot about who Kuroo nicknamed ‘Freckles’. Hell, they probably knew more about Yamaguchi then they did their boyfriend of three years. Yamaguchi though was Tsukishima’s childhood friend and thus was given what Bokuto claimed an unfair advantage. 

He saw under Tsukishima’s walls. (Like they all wanted to.)

He could read Tsukishima like a book. (Like Akaashi wanted to.)

He had known Tsukishima before he became an ‘Ice Prince’. (Like Kuroo wanted to.)

He knew how to best take care of Tsukishima. (Like Bokuto wanted to.)

It wasn’t like they were scared Yamaguchi was going to try and ‘steal’ their boyfriend away, they trusted Tsukishima’s word of nothing between them. Not to mention Yamaguchi claiming he was straight.

They just wanted to know Tsukishima as close as Yamaguchi did. Wanted the unlimited knowledge of their withheld boyfriend. 

Though they definitely did not blame Tsukishima for the way he was. No matter the circumstances they had all known the adventure it would be to accept the boy in their hearts. As such they were slowly learning to take care of their blonde partner, learning the ins and outs of building trust and love with him. He was an enigma, full of unheard kindness, loyalty, and enduring personality that they all loved to cherish. He was a minx that made each day worth waking up for. 

He came into their world and rocked it, leaving all three of the men in a stupor.

Even so, through years of dating the blonde Kuroo, Akaashi, and Bokuto could all write the amount of information they had about Tsukishima and only fill 3/4ths of a piece of paper. Even worse, a good chunk of that information came from when Yamaguchi would slip something while visiting Tsukishima and his said lovers. 

(information about tsuki!!! <3

  1. he likes strawberry cake!
  2. is not a morning person >:(
  3. doesn’t share his earbuds!
  4. watches movies with subtitles even though he can hear!



-Bokuto

  1. shaves his legs (i can’t complain, they’re sexy soft)
  2. likes cats (but refuses to admit it!)
  3. takes multi-vitamins (like an old man, it’s hilarious)
  4. cute obsession with dinosaurs (he won’t tell me why he likes them though)
  5. I think his favourite colour is green (DO NOT take my word on it)



-Kuroo

  1. he likes having his back rubbed, he holds himself too stiff all-day
  2. he talks to the house plants when no one’s home
  3. sometimes I catch him counting how many times he’s chewed his food
  4. his parents are divorced, he’ll talk about his mom but not his dad
  5. he loves feeding the birds that gather at the back of the apartment complex
  6. likes to reread his favourite books during the winter



-Akaashi

  1. he has a mole on the back of his neck near his hairline
  2. he’s a really good cook and baker
  3. he steals everyone’s clothes
  4. total pillow princess
  5. he hates wearing contacts, they dry his eyes too much
  6. he has a beautiful singing voice, Bokuto’s the only person to confirm
  7. he gets hungry in the middle of the night
  8. he likes when the house is full of noise or music



-Kuroo, Bokuto, Akaashi

  1. “Tsuki used to have a family dog named Oiko, she was so sweet.”
  2. “Tsuki gets insomnia sometimes when he’s stressed.”
  3. “Tsuki lived off pain medicine and caffeine in middle school.”
  4. “Tsuki has extended family in America.”
  5. “Tsuki’s mom speaks English and so does Tsukki, that’s why he’s so good at it, he doesn’t even have an accent! He only speaks it to his mom and Akiteru-san though.”
  6. “Tsuki used to be scared of being alone in the dark.”
  7. “Tsuki saved me from bullies the first day we met and that’s how we became friends.”
  8. “Tsuki won’t tell you guys but he really likes early 2000’s music, his mom basically raised him on it!”
  9. “Tsuki hates being disappointed, it always makes him cry.”
  10. “Tsuki will always say his favourite animal is dinosaurs even though they aren’t animals but his actual favourite is birds.” 



-Yamaguchi )

So having so little information compared to the vault sized amount Yamaguchi had, the three felt jealous. They wouldn’t ever show it though. 

Because despite the emotions towards him that they let fester inside they were also aware it was an issue that wasn’t the younger boys fault. Yamaguchi was nothing but kind to them, and most of all he supported Tsukishima’s relationship with them as if they were the second coming of Christ. He was an angel (even though the multiple times they stated such to Tsukishima the younger would only sneer and say “You’re all fools.”). But even that came to show how little they knew about him. It was a sick cycle.

With all this brewing it was no surprise that Tsukishima’s weekly dinner dates with the boy were starting to weigh heavy in their hearts. 

… 

“I’m heading out, don’t burn the apartment down please, we don’t have the money.” Tsukishima called over his shoulder, walking into the genkan past the three boys huddled on the living room couch. 

Bokuto peeked put of the blanket cacoon he had wrapped himself into while Kuroo was paused wrestling for it back. “You look really pretty today, babe!” He cheered though it was mildly muffled from the blanket. 

Kuroo let out a wolf-whistle as he too looked over Tsukishima’s form as said boy slipped on his shoes in the doorway. (Emerald green hightops.)

Akaashi dropped his book into his lap to peer at what the two men next to him were making such noise over. He did not seem disappointed if his raised eyebrows had anything to say about it.

“You do look rather stunning today, baby.” Akaashi added, voice not nearly as loud as the other two on the couch but just as verbally appreciative. 

Tsukishima didn’t visibly flush but the three all knew the compliments were appreciated with the way he took a second to spin in the doorway for Bokuto and Kuroo to continue catcalling him. (He wore an emerald green and cream white gingham sweater tucked into black high waisted pants, a brown and gold belt holding them up and a long cream white jacket was thrown over it.)

“Woo-hoo, look at that spin!”

“That jacket babe, you’re killin’ it!”

“Crush me with them thighs, baby boy!”

“Are you an angel? Cause I think your ass in those jeans just sent me to heaven!”

Tsukishima chuckled at them before walking over the couch to give each of them a peck on the lips. Walking back to the front door he grabbed his bag and keys.

“I’ll be home late, Yama will be driving me home so don’t wait up. That means you Akaashi.” Tsukishima said before he finally opened the door and left. The closing of the door behind him gentle despite his reprimand of Akaashi’s sleeping habits. (Aka, his tendency to of not being able to fall asleep without all his boyfriends in bed.)

“Ohh shit, Keiji, Tsuki called you out. Looks like you gotta take his spot as the little spoon tonight so we can keep you trapped!” Bokuto jeered as he rolled closer to Akaashi in his blanket burrito. 

Akaashi only rolled his eyes before raising his book back into his line of vision. “I’d rather perish than be a little spoon.” 

Kuroo laughed, his normal cackling that more sounded like a stroke than a laugh, before patting the top of Bokuto-burrito’s head. 

It wasn’t long until the silence rolled in.

… 

“I miss Tsuki, I want him to come home already.” Bokuto complained loudly over the white noise of the movie Kuroo had turned on. 

“Kou, he’s only been gone for twenty minutes.” Akaashi sighed as he once again had to drop the book he was reading.

Bokuto was still wrapped in the blanket burrito, Kuroo having given up fighting for the blanket and instead deciding to go cold, though Bokuto was now moved to the floor as Kuroo stretched out his legs across the couch. 

Kuroo looked down at Bokuto. “Yeah Bo, he’ll be home later tonight. No need to stress over it.”

Bokuto frowned as he turned his blanket-burrito body over to face the other two men on the couch. “Buuuuut- I want Tsuki to be home now! It’s no fair Freckles gets a date night with him every week!”

Akaashi rolled his eyes. “Like we don’t already live with him, Koutarou? Yamaguchi went from seeing Tsukishima every single day to all of a sudden once a week, take mercy on him please.”

Kuroo nodded at Akaashi’s reprimand and turned his focus back on the TV as Akaashi lifted his book once more. Bokuto only whined louder at the obvious ignoring of his state of distress.

“Keijiiiii! Tetsuuu! We send our precious boyfriend out every Friday night to go hang out with another guy we have no information on! Doesn’t that bother you guys? It makes me anxious!” Kuroo raised an eyebrow at Bokuto’s exclaim.

“You know what, Bo, that does bother me! Especially when you put it like that!” Akaashi felt like he could physically feel his eyes roll to the back of his head.    
  


“You’re both acting like we don’t bat an eye when Tetsurou goes out with Kozume.” Akaashi commented as both boys turned their heads at him.

“Hey! You call Kenma by his first name and don’t call Yamaguchi by his!” Kuroo pointed out with a smirk across his face. 

Akaashi physically flustered at the call out, raising his book as if to smack the smirk off Kuroo’s face. “I’m just closer to Kozume than Yamaguchi, that doesn’t mean anything.”

“I know Tsuki is allowed to go out and do stuff with whoever he wants and it’s not our place to like, dictate, who he hangs out with but it would be nice if we got to know him more. Right?” Bokuto asked, voice softer from thinking out loud.

Kuroo and Akaashi both quit their game of ‘are you gonna hit me? I dare you.’, turning to face Bokuto together.

“That’s… actually not a bad idea Koutarou.” Akaashi remarked as he then reached for his phone.

“Uh? It was?” Bokuto asked, quite dumbfounded for a moment as Kuroo gave him a thumbs up.

Akaashi continued poking at his phone, starting to type. 

“We’ll go to the person who would know Yamaguchi and Tsukishima’s relationship the best, Akiteru-san.” 

“Ooooh!” Kuroo and Bokuto both cheered in understanding, shouting praises at Akaashi’s smarts and ‘beautiful brain’.

… 

**Contact:** Akiteru Tsukishima

Hello, Akiteru-san. If possible would you be free to meet up soon with me, Kuroo, and Bokuto?

  * Keiji Akaashi



hey :) i’ll be free next friday if that works for you guys!

Yes, that is perfect. Would you like to go out to eat while we talk?

  * Keiji Akaashi



yes sir ;) ramen sounds good

Here is the address for this ramen place, XXX XXXXX XXX, tell me if that is okay.

  * Keiji Akaashi



*thumbs up emoji* looks nice!

Is 06:00 (18:00) okay for Friday?

  * Keiji Akaashi



perfect! btw has anyone told you that you text like an old man Akaashi?? 

Many.

  * Keiji Akaashi



… 

“Wow, this place is pretty nice! I saw it on google but the pictures there do not give it justice!” Akiteru laughs as he takes his seat in front of the three men. Akaashi, Kuroo, and Bokuto all squeezed into one side of the booth in an almost hilarious picture. It reminds Akiteru of a clown car.

The ramen restaurant is warm and the yellow lighting gives it a homey feeling to it. There were some stock photo pictures hung on the walls and obviously plastic plants around them but they did nothing to dismay the pleasant atmosphere. 

What could kill the vibe of the restaurant though was the frowns on the three men in front of him. 

“Okay, let’s not even wait ‘till we order then. What’s going on with you three? If it’s a fight then I’m immediately on Kei’s side, deadass.” Kuroo reached out a hand as if to knock the idea out of the air.

“No, no, no! Sorry if we gave off that impression, we’ve just been... uh-”

“Nervous!” Bokuto cut off, waving his hands around and almost smacking both his boyfriends in the seat next to him.

“Nervous? About what? Wait, are you guys asking to mar-”

“NO! Not like we don’t love Kei likethatorplanonnevermarryinghim, it’s just that well we don’t have the money saved up and we don’t really feel settled in yet withAkaashi’sjobaswellasKeijust finishing collegejustlastyear, not to mention we allstillhavemountainsofstudentdebt, I mean-” Kuroo and Bokuto scrambled, both talking over each other before Akaashi hissed at them to ‘for the love of all things holy shut the fuck up right now or so help me god I will beat you both right here in this goddamn restaurant.’

“I’m sorry Akiteru-san, no we do not plan on asking for Kei’s hand in marriage at the moment but we did have a favour to ask of you. That is why these bafoons beside me were so nervous.” Akaashi explained calmly after taking a deep sigh. 

Akiteru chuckled before leaning closer in to talk. “I figured, you guys are just so funny. Anyway, ask away! Future brother-in-law is here to help.”

“We wanted to know more about Yamaguchi.” Bokuto supplied, eyes wide and curious.

Akiteru let shock clearly fill his face. “As in Tadashi? Yamaguchi Tadashi?”

The three then nodded. “He’s Kei’s closest friend and we just want to know more about him, he knows plenty about us and… about Kei. Way more than we do.” Akaashi explained further.

Akiteru let his eyebrows drop and his smile fall into a look of thinking.

“Okay.” He agreed simply. 

“Okay?” Kuroo asked.

“Yeah, okay. I can tell you guys about Tadashi.” Akiteru stated simply once again. 

“Yamaguchi Tadashi is Kei’s first, and for a while, only friend. Kei never got along with other kids back then, he would get scared of them and act out. He got into a lot of fights in elementary school as well. By his last year in elementary the fights stopped but only because Kei had a massive growth spurt that year, none of the other kids bothered with him. Now, this part I only know because Tadashi told me, apparently Tadashi was being bullied by some kids at a park in our neighbourhood and Kei stepped in and saved him. After that Tadashi started to seek Kei out at school and Kei did the same. He didn’t tell me this but I think Kei was Tadashi’s first friend too.” Akiteru lamented, pulling out his phone to show some photos.

The first photo was of a ten-year-old Kei, tall as ever, with square black rims and dinosaur pyjamas sitting with a much shorter Tadashi in puppy dog pyjamas. Kei had a small blush on his face as Tadashi slung an arm around his shoulders to bring them both into the frame of the photo, a bright smile on his face. Their first sleepover.

The second photo was a candid shot. Both boys were laying on their stomachs, heads propped up by their arms. Young Kei and Tadashi were outside on the engawa, in Kei’s hands and scattered around them were his dinosaur figurines. A finger pointing at one of them, the photo showed he was in the middle of saying something to a starry-eyed Tadashi. 

The third and last photo is candid as well, its taken right in the Tsukishima front doorway. A very tall and lanky Kei is standing in the house, a blush high on his face and obviously trying not to cry while a very flustered Tadashi is standing on the porch handing over a present box. It’s sickeningly cute.

“Tadashi has always stuck with Kei. They even chose their middle school and high school together. Kei would help Tadashi study before every test and quiz so Tadashi could stay in the same class as him. They were inseparable. One of the things I think made them so close was the fact that Tadashi was there… when I and Kei’s relationship got really bad, and I left for college, leaving him all alone. Tadashi was even there when the divorce happened. Tadashi was there for the worst of what happened in Kei’s life and  _ stayed _ . He is incredibly loyal and would do anything for him.” Akiteru finished, putting his phone away and then reaching for a menu. 

“Now who’s hungry?” Akiteru asked, oblivious to the turning cogs in the brains in front of him.

… 

“Ughh- now I feel bad!” Bokuto exclaimed on their walk home. Bellies filled with ramen and still warm from the restaurant. 

“Yeah, we were jealous for nothing. It’s not Freckles’ fault that he’s just literally apparently been with Kei since basically birth!” Kuroo agreed, keeping in step with the group as they treaded home quickly to get out of the autumn cold.

“Last year of elementary is not ‘since birth’, Tetsurou.” Akaashi saltily comments.

“I think the dinner really helped us realise something though, guys.” Bokuto says as he stops walking in the middle of the sidewalk, making sure both Akaashi and Kuroo are looking at him.

“Realise what, Bo?” Kuroo asked, urging Bokuto to speak up about his revelation.

“We just need to be patient with Tsukki! If we stay by him for forever then we’ll learn just as much as Yamaguchi!” Bokuto smiled, looking at his other boyfriends for confirmation. 

With that exclaim, Akaashi and Kuroo smiled back.

“You’re right, we’ll stay by him forever and learn just as much, Koutarou.”

… 

“I’m home.” Tsukishima stated as he paused at the genkan to slip off his shoes and jacket. Unwinding himself from his bag strap as well.

“You’re home early, baby.” Akaashi replied, setting his book down from his seat in the living room chair. 

Tsukishima just sighed in response, stretching out before walking over to Akaashi’s chair. Taking the book beneath his slender hands Tsukishima placed it on the coffee table in front of them. Making sure to lay it pages first as to save Akaashi’s spot. With the book out of the way Tsukishima plopped himself into Akaashi’s lap with a hum of contentment, letting his long legs hang over the side of the chair and his arms wrap around Akaashi’s shoulders, burrying his face into Akaashi’s neck. 

“How was dinner with Tadashi?” Akaashi asked, freeing an arm to slowly rub at Tsukishima’s back and shoulders.

“It was great but… I missed you guys. I really wanted to go home.” Akaashi felt his heartbeat rise at the admission from his normally ‘emotionally stunted’ boyfriend. It was sweet and honest and everything Tsukishima was trying his hardest to be around the three boys who loved him so much.

“Well, thing one and thing two are knocked out right now. They tuckered each other out playing Mario Cart about an hour ago but I’m here all night.” Akaashi punctuated with an eyebrow wiggle. 

Tsukishima groaned in response. “Oh my god, you’ve been spending too much time with them. Blink twice if you need me to save you.” 

Akaashi laughed lightheartedly, kissing Tsukishima’s forehead tenderly making the blonde boy blush. 

“Let’s go ahead and head to bed too then, I’m sure they missed you too.” 

… 

It was easy, letting go of the jealousy they all felt about one Yamaguchi Tadashi. Akiteru’s insight over ramen that night gave them a new idea of how to look at their boyfriend’s relationship. Yamaguchi was a boy that had been there for him since the beginning and was never planning on leaving, loyal until his last breath. 

Yamaguchi knew because he was there, not because he tried more or had some magical way of reading Tsukishima’s brain (Bokuto’s idea).

He was there before Akaashi, Bokuto, or Kuroo even got the chance to meet him. He was there and that was all that mattered.

So when ‘Yamaguchi’ turned into ‘Tadashi’ and when ‘Friday date night’ turned into ‘Friday group date night’ the only man to blame was Akiteru Tsukishima.


	6. VI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Ot4 Learn a Little About Akiteru Through an Interesting Story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's finally over! I'm so sorry this last instalment took so long to upload, my school recently starting back up as well as my own brother coming into town kept me quite busy. I wanna say thank you all for reading and commenting, not to mention leaving kudos on this work. it's been really fun.
> 
> comments and kudos are still very much appreciated!
> 
> (shameless self-promo: my next work will be a longer chapter fic of a kurootsuki swan lake au, if you any of you sound interested please feel free to comment about it! I'm a little iffy about posting)
> 
> reminder: my work is NOT beta read (due to me having no friends) so any mistakes you find please message me about them!

**no.6 (+1)**

“How would you all feel about letting Akiteru take us out drinking sometime next week?” Tsukishima asked hesitantly, hands fiddling together after settling dinner in front of the three starving men at the table. 

Kuroo quirks an eyebrow then turning to face Bokuto, Bokuto shrugs and then turns to Akaashi, Akaashi sighs before turning back to Tsukishima. 

“I don’t see why not, what’s the occasion?” Akaashi asks, raising a perfectly held chopstick to start grabbing food to put on his plate. Silently threatening to stab Kuroo multiple times with it as he attempts to steal more food off his own plate.

“Nii-san got a promotion and doesn’t have any friends to celebrate with basically. He says all his friends are busy.” Tsukishima sighs out as he lets Bokuto pile some food on his plate as well as his own as he sits down with the men at the table.

Kuroo snorted as he started to inhale his food, Bokuto soon following.

“Remember to chew your actual food, barbarians.” Tsukishima grimaced, watching Kuroo and Bokuto stuff food into their faces like rabid squirrels or something of the sort. 

It wasn’t until he looked over at Akaashi did he bust out in uncontrolled laughter. Unknown to him or their normal routine, tonight Akaashi had also stuffed his face. Cartoonishly frozen at Tsukishima’s laughter, his mouth was full of food Tsukishima was sure was only half-chewed with his cheeks puffed like a chipmunk. 

Over delicious food and Tsukishima’s laughter did the night grow long and full of love.

… 

The bar was dimly lit, most likely to help fester the homey environment inside. The floors were wood and the walls were painted a deep maroon. The walls covered in art varying from posters with a frame and some canvases from local artists. There were booths lining the back walls, chairs and tables near the middle of the room and then an actual bar table wrapped around the right side of the room. 

Akiteru was seated already in one of the said booths. Waving animatedly over at his younger brother and boyfriend entourage. Somewhere between sitting, standing and leaning on the booth table in front of him all at the same time. 

Akaashi, Bokuto and Kuroo could hear the soft ‘tch’ Tsukishima let out after making eye contact with said brother. Only half a minute into the night and Tsukishima already looked annoyed at his antics. 

The group quickly made their way across the moderately crowded bar and separated to take their seats at the booth. Akaashi, Bokuto and Kuroo all slid into one side as Akiteru pulled Tsukishima to sit next to him on the other side. 

Akiteru immediately launched into a story about his adventure to get to the bar. Akiteru didn’t live very far away. A testament to how their boyfriend and his brother’s relationship had grown. Akiteru had fought tooth and nail for years for any ounce of trust and Akaashi, Bokuto and Kuroo all knew it. They had watched it. 

At first, when Tsukishima graduated and told his family he was moving out Akiteru had demanded to know where his little brother was going to live. Obviously and expectedly Tsukishima never answered him. It took three months of Tsukishima living in the city before he gave in to his older siblings pestering. The texts, calls, attempts to follow him home, offers to pick him up and so on. 

Tsukishima had acted pissed when after Akiteru finally received his address Akiteru had the brazen and reckless decision to  _ move _ closer. Akiteru had full-on ended his lease and moved into a closer apartment complex to be closer to his little brother. Tsukishima complained but only for a week, hiding his comfort of having his brother so near.

As plain as his true feelings were Akaashi, Bokuto and Kuroo also witnessed their boyfriends own struggle. They knew it was hard to trust for the blonde boy. Trust just didn’t come easy after the falling out of the Tsukishima brothers.

Akiteru had been Tsukishima’s whole world, his pillar, his role model. Saving him from their less than stellar home life, his nightmares, his fears. Akiteru had been the glowing stars around him, guiding, making the night much less lonely and much more safe. You could ask anyone who had known the brothers back then. They made a striking set. The strong, independent and mature older Tsukishima and the intelligent, cunning and witty younger Tsukishima. Two brothers who looked at each other and saw their whole worlds. 

Akiteru looked at Kei like he was the ocean, crashing against the shores. Unrelenting and free. Something to be treasured but never kept. Something he wanted to protect and something he knew could not stay in his arms forever. (He just hoped the day it came, when the waves receded, they would come back.)

Kei looked at Akiteru like he hung the moon and stars. Dependable and wondrous. Someone he thought would never let him fail, never let him become disappointed. Someone he loved more than his heart could handle and someone he relied on spirit and soul. (He just hoped his brother, his solid foundation, never crumbled. Never disappointed.)

They knew that Tsukishima once had an unbreakable trust in his brother. A trust that was ripped away by stupid lies and regrettable actions. Misplaced emotions and a relationship bound to fail. 

The truth had never hurt Tsukishima so much.

The truth had never ripped Kei out of Akiteru’s arms so fast.

The wounds never healed the way they were supposed to. Distance may have scabbed it over but wordless visits back home and silent dinners just made the scabs open and bleeding happen all over again. Starting a sick cycle of scab, open, bleed. Leave, fight, hurt.

They hit a breaking point. A place in their lives when finally the fighting stopped. The anger and betrayal simmering under skin stopped. There was no more blood to bleed and no more wars to battle. Soon it was just the Tsukishima brothers again. The sorry, regretful but determined older and the mournful, understanding but scared younger. 

Letting his brother in, back into his life, was laborious. The words to work back old wounds crawled at the back of his throat sometimes. The need to let his pain be heeded. But, the need to have his brother back. The love he still had for his brother was much more powerful than youthful sorrows. 

Akiteru gained trust slowly and now they were steady in their relationship. Akiteru had a key to the apartment, they had monthly dinners, they had sporadic but steady trips back home together and rarely was there any conflict between the two. Well, other than Tsukishima’s blunt sarcasm, deadpan persona, and witty remarks to about anything that came out of Akiteru’s mouth. But conveniently Akiteru was prone to ignoring or letting such things slide. 

“-and since she was begging me to let her in I had to stay back for almost twenty minutes! People should be more responsible, well, college kids who live in my apartment complex should be more responsible! I swear this is the fifth kid I’ve had to buzz in!” Akiteru explained, waving animatedly while Kuroo and Bokuto nodded enthusiastically. They were both amazingly good at spurring Akiteru on with his stories, asking questions and staying engaged. 

“Maybe you wouldn’t have to buzz so many in if you didn’t have a reputation for doing it so often.” Tsukishima replied, a bored look on his face as he watched Akiteru sputter in response. 

“They can’t be left out! It’s dangerous! They could get sick from the rain or the cold or, or, or something worse! They could be kidnapped!” Akiteru complained, tugging at Tsukishima’s shoulder. 

Tsukishima let out a ‘tch’ at the action and rolled his eyes. “Then let them.”

Akiteru pouted as Kuroo let out a horrendous laugh. “Yeah, yeah Tsuki! You tell him, not like you feed the stray cats at the back of the apartment complex cause ‘They might starve, they don’t have a mama cat around, Tetsu!’.” 

Tsukishima let a horrified look fill his face as he attempted to swat Kuroo’s shoulder across the table. The table erupted in laughter and every face was smiling. 

… 

“Keeei- It’s so hot in this bar! I’m too warm!” Akiteru complained, laying his flushed face against Tsukishima’s shoulder. Tsukishima, almost just as much under the influence as the older, smiled down at his brother. Snorting in an unimaginably cute way, well, according to his boyfriends across the table. 

Bokuto, Akaashi, and Kuroo had both drank with the brothers though in lower amounts. It was a night for Akiteru’s celebration, he deserved to get as smashed as he wanted with the promise the other boys would take him home farther into the night. Though as per Akiteru’s wishes he wanted his younger brother to match him drink for drink. (It wasn’t mentioned that the younger had a higher tolerance.)

“We can leave soon if you’re both ready?” Asked Kuroo, designated driver for the night, untangling the arm he had resting around Bokuto’s shoulder to reach for his boyfriend’s jackets in the seat next to him. 

“Just roll up your sleeves, idiot.” Tsukishima scoffed ignoring Kuroo and pushing Akiteru up off his shoulder. 

Akiteru groaned, letting his head flop to the side, closing his eyes. “Do it for me?” 

The boys were slightly shocked by the intimacy of the question. More shocked as Tsukishima simply nodded and reached his hands towards Akiteru’s arms laying on the table between them. 

“I think it is time to go home soon, Tetsurou.” Akaashi said, voice level and composed. No amount of drinking blinding him from common sense. 

“Woaah-” Bokuto said, eyes on Tsukishima as he rolled his older brother’s sleeves up. Looking over the both of them joined in watching as pale forearms were freed and Akiteru sighed in relief. 

“Oh.” Kuroo mumbled as they continued to stare. 

Long, white and raised scars laid on his right arm. Horizontal and jagged. Tsukishima didn’t seem worried though. The scars were old and definitely not self-inflicted by the way they covered his arm all around. The biggest starting just below the top of his wrist and progressing down to his elbow.

Akiteru opened his eyes to look across the table. Meeting their stares without hesitation. “You can ask.” He stated simply.

Bokuto openly fidgeted, shaking his head as Kuroo joined. “That would be rude, really we shouldn’t.” 

Akiteru didn’t fight it, he just nodded in response. Showing that maybe he actually hadn’t wanted to answer. Just being his normal and default kind.

Tsukishima looked away, not meeting his boyfriend’s eyes as he started to move out of the booth. Tab already paid for said boyfriends started to move as well. Kuroo grabbing and handing out jackets, Bokuto grabbing Tsukishima’s bag and supporting himself on Akaashi’s side. 

Kuroo holding Tsukishima by his waist, Bokuto supported between Akaashi and Kuroo, and Akiteru walking by Tsukishima’s side they all made their way out of the bar into the cold and silent night. 

Akiteru now silent about being too warm.

… 

It wasn’t until they had made it home. Shoes in the genkan, sweaty bar clothes in the hamper, dressed in various shirts/sweatshirts/shorts/sweatpants and curled into each other on their normal cuddle pile was the topic of the scars brought up. 

“He didn’t want to say anything because he’s worried I’ll feel guilty.” Tsukishima blurted into the silence of their room. The white noise of their air conditioning unit and fan doing nothing to cover the fact that guilt was still apparent in his tone. Alcohol letting true emotions seep into his words.

Bokuto shifted up from his position on Tsukishima’s chest, Akaashi following suit and sitting up behind him to listen more closely. Kuroo gripped his arm around Tsukishima’s waist tighter and tilted his head up. 

“I think I was six? Nii-san was eleven. I’m not really sure but I remember we were really young. The divorce hadn’t happened yet.” The three boys watched as Tsukishima closed his eyes as if imagining exactly how the event happened.

“He had a volleyball camp that weekend. Mom was visiting her sisters that weekend and I had nowhere to go other than to stay home with our…  _ him _ . He didn’t like that though.” The three visibly stiffened at the mention of Tsukishima’s dad. Bokuto grabbing hold of one of Tsukishima’s hands and Akaashi lifting his own to caress Tsukishima’s cheek softly. 

“ _ He _ wanted to go out on a ‘guy’s trip’ with his work friends so once Nii-san was gone and so was Mother he decided to lock me in my room. He left a case of water with me and that was it. He locked my room door as well as the front door and left for the weekend.” Tsukishima kept his eyes closed, focusing on the kind and sweet touches of his boyfriends. He could feel the frown on Kuroo’s face though, the noirette having his face nuzzled into the back of the blonde’s neck. 

“Do you guys remember that glass pane on the front door?” Tsukishima suddenly asked. Akaashi gasped quietly, already figuring out most of the story but staying quiet as he and the others nodded.

“Nii-san had been the first person home, he had thought  _ he _ was going to be home so he hadn’t brought his house key. I heard him struggle with the door handle and started yelling for him. It’s crazy he had heard me from all the way upstairs.” Tsukishima paused, punctuating the end of his sentence with a sigh.

“He had been so pissed, he’s always had a temper despite how he is nowadays. Eventually, he gave up on picking the doorknob or hopping the back fence so he broke the glass pane. The glass shattered and cut up his arm as he reached in to unlock the door from the inside. He had to go to the hospital afterwards but he was fine, nothing too serious.” Tsukishima’s voice wavered, turning to hide his head against the pillow under him.

“He had promised me that day that if our dad had ever done something like that again he would find a way to keep me safe. That we didn’t have to live like that, scared and hurting. I trusted him. Five years later he kicked  _ him _ out of the house.” If Tsukishima let a sob out they didn’t say a word, just held him closer with gentle hands.

“That was probably the second-best day of my life. The first being when we first got all together.” They smiled at him, kissing affectionately and chastely on any piece of skin close enough. It was a sob but a sob of happiness. 

“I love you all so fucking much. You all mean so much to me.” They all laughed softly at his sappiness. Knowing in the morning he would be embarrassed from saying such things. He quickly whipped his eyes though, the emotional moment only lasting for so long.

“We love you too, very, very much baby.” Akaashi said, settling back down on the bed.

“More than anything, moonshine.” Kuroo tacked on, letting his grip lighten and lay back relaxed on his pillow. 

“I would break a million glass windows for you, babe!” Bokuto claimed, a little too loud for two at night but laying his head back on Tsukishima’s chest and smiling widely. 

“Goodnight.” Tsukishima mumbled before he too snuggled back into the arms of his boyfriends, happy and knowing not only he was loved by them but also his family.

… 

The story was never talked about again but lived in the head of Akaashi, Bokuto, and Kuroo’s minds. It showed a side of Akiteru that they knew existed but never paid attention to. 

Akiteru was many things. Akiteru was polite and kind. Years of being the older sibling giving him an air of maturity. Though behind that maturity was a trait of mischievousness but goodhearted nature. His tendency to be stubborn as well as a tendency to love surprises. Most of all he was and would always be enamoured with his little brother. Protective and loving since the moment a much smaller and much younger Kei was placed in his arms. He was an older brother in spirit.

The story just added onto his legacy. Evidence of his selflessness when it came to the younger Tsukishima brother.

For once, Akaashi, Bokuto and Kuroo could thank Tsukishima for helping them understand Akiteru a little more.

  
  



End file.
